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That one fly generally in the house, that no matter how hard you smack it with the fly swatter seems to live (and fly away)
What the hell! I thought I just killed that fly!! It must be a Jesus fly..!!
Jesus Zipper, the line of skin that goes from the base of your man stick (penis) straight down and around your pill pouch (scrotum) all the way to your brown star (anus).
The term Jesus Zipper was coined by AJ Styles after a mishap in the ring that left him straddling the ropes in an unceremonious fashion. During an interview he said "I landed right on my Jesus Zipper."
When you're absolutely wasted and can't get your dick up, but you need to fuck a chick. You pray to Jesus for a solid erection and he comes through like a bro.
Q: Hey, what are you doing in church?
A: I was smashed the other night but needed to fuck this chick, so I prayed and God tossed me the greatest Jesus Boner I've ever had. Now I feel obligated to go to church.
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A Newfoundland saying, often said when one is becoming stressed out or annoyed.
"By da jesus! Dat car almost rear ended me!"
A meme coined from the (slightly disturbing) music video of "I Feel Better" by Hot Chip referring to the British comedian Ross Lee in the video. He's called Cancer Jesus (or in some instances "White Ghandi," and the like) mainly because he appears awkwardly in a shiny white hospital gown and is completely bald and "shoops da woop" on the fictitious members of the boy band in the video. Needless to say the video may be funny to some people and for the most part just leave the viewer awestruck at what they watched.
Friend A: Dude, did you watch that Hot Chip vid I sent you??
Friend B: Ya, it was sooo f#@$ed up man, wtf was with Cancer Jesus, LOL?
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When a person of secular reason has finished explaining something, to the extent of their knowledge, and the person they are explaining to says, Jesus is the reason beyond that explanation.
Friend: Did you enjoy talking with David about the origin of species.
Guy: Ya but he kept Jesus Smuggling when I got to the primordial soup.
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Dale Earnhardt Jr. NASCAR driver/Southern U.S. spiritual figure
In talladegastan (also known as the southern holy land) there lies a redneck jesus. One who can make the masses consume their mass quantities of bud light and bask in his victory, and pledge their allegiance to him and the heavenly father Dale Earnhardt Sr. For it is told this is the true path to the land of Daytona, a heaven-like place with more left turns.
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