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Random
Noun. The act of engaging in mutual masturbation only, or engage in cybersex, with a partner without actual intercourse taking place.
Verb. To engage solely in mutual masturbation, or engage in cybersex, with a partner and nothing else.
Filbert and I had a wank and thank last night on instant messenger.
Lisa wanked and thanked with her ex-boyfriend after they broke up.
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Pastime carried out by females or males of the general public and or celebrities. The act of masturbation by a man or a woman thinking of a subject or persons being "topical"/ current i.e. in the news and or media at the time of the masturbation/wank act.
during the Wimbledon tennis tournament (2week period), if wanking in the morning, one might say:
"i woke up this morning and had a topical wank whilst thinking of Serena Williams nailing Tsvetana Pironkova with a strap on cock in a lesbian love fest.
"i bashed one out last night during the news to that Russian spy Anna Chapman. It was a deeply satisfying topical wank".
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This is when you masturbate in an unusual way.
You could be upside down at the time, using two elbows, your feet, sports equipment or rolling pins.
The purpose of extreme wanking is to spice up your wank life
Extreme Wanking example
The Andre Agassi : Double back hander
1. Assume a seated position
2. Point your legs to the heavens.
3. Put your hands underneath your legs.
4. Put both hands around your penis.
5. Enjoy!
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A name used to describe someone who is a proper time-wasting bell-end, a really useless prick.
"Dave hasn't turned up for work again, he's a proper wank pellet
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The feeling of rage one gets if they have not had a wank (i.e. masturbated) for a while. Similar to the rage one might experience during a dry spell.
Often caused by unrealistic challenges, such as trying not to masturbate for a week or more.
Not to be confused with wankerage or wankage.
Person A: Dude, can I have some gum?
Person B: JUST FUCK OFF!
Person A: What the hell man?
Person B: Sorry dude... I've just got some serious wank rage.
Person A: You are forgiven, poor soul.
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The act of masturbating to avoid any sexual tension before seeing a person you really shouldn't have sex with.
I had a strategic wank thinking 'bout his mom, before I went to his family house. Certainly helped!
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A device used (often a phone or computer) to assist you in the ritual of regular and/or routine wanking
Argh! I've been really bored recently... My wanking widget is broken and I literally have nothing to do!
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