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When the object of your affections is *just* a bit too young, but give it five years...
"Dude, she's illegal"
"Yeah but she's my five year plan"
9👍 9👎
a child who’s mother got pregnant with them while on plan b
Going to Moe's southwest grill and ordering one cup of queso and taking advantage of their free chips and salsa to feed as many people as possible.
Chump 1- "Shit I'm hungry"
Chump 2- "We have practice in ten tho and we only have $3 between the 10 of us"
Chump 1- "Moe's value plan?"
A phrase used when nothing is going according to plan.
P1: All according to plan!
P2: I'm assuming this checkmate is also a part of your plan?
P1: Shut up
When you eat like a fat-ass earlier in the collegiate semester, and have to spend your own money on food after you run out. See also Maruchan Brahmin.
Frat Guy/Athlete 1(early in the semester): "Bro, l love getting brunch at the caf every saturday and sunday. Although it costs 9 meal points, I get soooooo much fuckin' bacon."
Frat Guy 2: "Dude, fuck brunch. Late night Half and halfs are the way to go."
Frat Guy/Athlete (one month later): "I have no more meal points. Meal plan karma really fucked the shit out of me."
Lil B: "It's ok bero, now you get to cook like a pretty bitch. SWAG."
Timing/postponing an udate on a social network in such a way that one will maximize exposure to it, and as such maximize responses to it. In other words, when one gets an idea for a funny/interesting/deep facebook status one must make sure that one posts it at a time when most people are bored at home and likely to see it and comment on or like it. It is also important to be sure that this update does not coincide with another significant event (major sporting/political/popular culture events) because then one's post will be lost in the multidude of mundane and banal posts reporting the outcome of the significant event.
1.
Guy: "Dude, I just got the funniest idea ever! I'm tweeting it right now!"
Dude: "No Guy, it's Saturday night. Everyone's gonna be out partying and getting wasted, so noone will see your tweet. You've gotta plan when to post. Tomorrow morning at 10 will be a good time, when everyone's in bed, hungover, and online because they don't wanna get up."
Guy: "Woah, you speak true, dude."
2.
Guy: "Ohmigawd! I just realised the meaning of life! Updating Facebook status right now!!"
Dude: "No no no! Plan when to post! The final match of the soccer world cup is starting in 10 minutes. Noone's gonna give a shit about Facebook right now, and after the match everyone's gonna be making statuses gloating about how their team won, or complaining if theirs lost. You'll have to give it a day if you want humanity to benefit from your wisdom."
Guy: "Dude, you're so wise!"
A rare move used during sexual intercourse where the female pulls open her vagina then the male ejaculates trying to land his sperm in the hole
Last night I had to use the death star plans like Luke Skaywalker