If someone is having gay thoughts they need to turn them off like a light switch.
I started having thoughts of Jared. Luckily I followed the Mormon Code! homo bad
A game in which you have a threesome with two mormons of the opposite sex who are both sad and depressed, so you use their tears as lube on your peen.
Person 1: Ayo you see those two girls I think they’re Mormons
Person 2: Yeah I played a game of sad Mormons with them
Person 1: Dude that’s fuckin gnarly
During a Mormon Soak, 7 elders shake the bed for 7 minutes.
I got pregnant from my Mormon Jacuzzi.
The Rocky Mountains, on the Coloradan side.
"Thank fuck for the anti Mormon defense wall, some of them get through occasionally, but we're still allowed to buy more than just 3.2 beer."
When a person rests their dick on another person's tongue while lying down and jiggles their penis by giggling. Also known as a John Smith.
Oh yeah, I got a Mormon blow job last night while watching Veggie Tales - I laughed so hard I came all over her face!
Jane only John Smiths me, it's too bad she won't let me watch cat fails while doing it... I'd blow such a load if a rat started chasing a cat around.
A modification of the traditional “2 in the pink, 1 in the stink” shocker, the Mormon Shocker is performed by simultaneously inserting 2 fingers in the stink (usually the pinky and ring fingers), and 1 finger in the pink (usually the index finger). It is a common practice in the Mormon community where anal penetration is a preferred premarital sexual act due their religious obligation of vaginal abstinence which naturally leads to a more sexually evolved anus.
I hooked up with a nice Mormon girl last night who wouldn’t have sex with me because she’s saving herself for marriage, so we settled for sodomy. I couldn’t even fit more than one finger in her virgin vagina so I had to give her the Mormon Shocker and stick one in her pink with two in her stink!
A modification of the traditional “2 in the pink, 1 in the stink” shocker, the Mormon Shocker is performed by simultaneously inserting 2 fingers in the stink (usually the pinky and ring fingers), and 1 finger in the pink (usually the index finger). It is a common practice in the Mormon community where anal penetration is a preferred premarital sexual act due their religious obligation of vaginal abstinence which naturally leads to a more sexually evolved anus.
I hooked up with a nice Mormon girl last night who wouldn’t have sex with me because she’s saving herself for marriage, so we settled for sodomy. I couldn’t even fit more than one finger in her virgin vagina so I had to give her the Mormon Shocker and stick one in her pink with two in her stink!