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An erection for the anus before marriage and for every orifice after.
Brad: I got that Mormon Boner.
Thad: You two aren’t married. Better get Becky some Depends.
During a Mormon Soak, 7 elders shake the bed for 7 minutes.
I got pregnant from my Mormon Jacuzzi.
The inasive species taking over a state called Nevada
Master Chief: "Have you seen the inasive species taking over a state called Nevada known as a Mormon Cricket?"
Lego Padme: "Yeah, where is the Frog Army?"
A Mormon steamer is a variation of a Cleveland steamer and hoch replaces Shit for porage.
This variation of the Cleveland steamer was made and pioneered by Eli W. Piryznski.
“Wow, Eli sure does give good Mormon Steamers!”
Mormons who do things for attention, to look like a baddie, for shock value, to prove themselves not be seen as someone who grew up in Utah or look like your average Mormon Joe. Does things normal people do but does it loudly to prove they don’t confine themselves. Doesn’t want to look like a goodie so they are obnoxious about being a baddie.
Typically goes to #lit concerts and wears lots of band tees to prove it, thinks cussing makes them extra hilarious, makes it a point to tell everyone they want a tattoo, talks about how many boys they’ve NCMOd and thinks it makes them a #baddie, participates in adult cliques and toxic woke culture and thinks they are being an activist (Research Obama Woke Culture), has that edgy Utah Mormon fashion taste and thinks they are being different but they are just wearing platform shoes and button up jeans like every other Mormon Baddie.
Fred “She’s so hawt and cool!”
Tommy “Don’t be fooled man. It’s unnatural. She’s just your typical Mormon Baddie. If we were outside of Utah you wouldn’t think so bro. She’s just liberal like us. Don’t settle.”
When you go to a church dance with all your Mormon friends and the next day you wake up with a headache, you legs are sore from all the line dancing and you can't remember the names of all the people you danced with.
Man, I just woke up with the worst mormon hangover!!
A term describing mormon events, church duties, religious practices, reading material, generally anything involving the mormon religion or culture.
Usually used by a mormon to a non-mormon who doesn't want further inquire further in his doings or whereabouts, because the non-mormon won't agree, or understand anyway.
Used by mormons to get out of something, and scapegoating it on their church.
Used my non-mormons to describe the behavior of a mormon, or to ridicule a non-mormon for exemplar behavior.
Non-Mormon: Want to hang out this Sunday?
Mormon: Nah dude, I have mormon stuff to do.
Non-Mormon: What are you reading?
Mormon: Mormon Stuff
Non-Mormon: Want to go to the bar with me tonight?
Mormon: I'll pass. I have mormon stuff to do.
Non-Mormon 1: Let's go to the strip club.
Non-Mormon 2: Nah, I have mormon stuff to do.
Sherie to a girlfriend: Jim didn't want to go for a late night skinny dip at the lake, he had better mormon stuff to do.