first wank

For some, the most important date in their sexual life history. Often connected to naked Claudia Schiffer, Sharon Stone or some other now elderly celeb. Usually celebrated with a long masturbation session.

Oh, today is the 20th anniversary of my first wank! I have to find a copy of Basic Instinct to celebrate it!

A: When did you lose your virginity, dude?
B: Hmmm, I can't tell you that. I can tell you about my first wank.
A: But you're 30 man...oh my goodness...

Bicycle wank

A special male masturbation position. It is performed whilst lying on your back with your legs in the air like the "Air Cycling" excercise. One hand is used to maintain balance whilst the other is used to do the masturbating. The typical outcome of this activity is ejaculating in one's own face.

I had a bicycle wank and got myself right in the eye.

Batty wank

To masterbate only through stimulation of the anus and rectum (i.e. The arse)

I had a batty wank in the bath this morning

Wet wank

A line used by Dave the sailor to describe visiting an Asian hooker.

Dave: we're coming into port..

John: yeah I know.

Dave: fancie a shave and a wet wank?

Fluff Wank

A quick wank of the cock performed to move the penis from a flaacid or semi-hard state to full on erection for penetration.

During foreplay with Rachel, Roger only achieved a semi so she gave him a quick fluff wank and got it so hard a cat couldn’t scratch it.

Golden Wank

Jerking off with a condom on

Oscar is doing a golden wank in his room

Ballistic wank

When you wank so hard, your cum makes a hole in the roof.

I took a ballistic wank this morning.