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the inability to see or recall if a man or woman has facial hair, including if it changes over time. not to be confused with beard blinders; the use of one's hands to part excessive facial or other hair. Ex "his beard was so copious she had to use beard blinders to kiss him
Beard blind in the witness made the garden gnome bank robbers hard to finger
Beard Balls are the hairs that hang off your balls and look like a beard.
So, Bro you gonna trim your Beard Balls? I did and I never felt better!
Facial hair worn by pussified, emasculated cucks who have sacrificed their testicles, wallets and pride to domineering female spouses or significant others in exchange for sex and social acceptance.
Similar in look to the ever popular dad beard, men who sport a provider beard often have one or more of the following traits: a side-parted preppy hairstyle, SJW approved eyeglasses (for the visually impaired) J. Crew polo shirts, Nantucket shorts, Sperry Top-Siders and an aura of feigned happiness.
Hey, who is the bearded guy driving the soccer mom SUV? Oh, that’s just your cousin. His provider beard is all that remains of his manhood after his wife made him have a vasectomy.
When you light a girls pubs on fire, then proceed to eat her out. The goal is to not get burned and make her cum!
guy1"Dude why is your face burned?"
guy2"I tried to give my girl a Bearded Phoenix, and phailed"
The scruffy, full-bodied beard that grows on the face of only the manliest of men. Not everybody can properly grow a Kevins-Beard, but those who can certainly enjoy an upper-echelon in the beard hierarchy.
Often associated with terms like 'masculinity', 'male', and 'strength'.
Urban legends commonly hold true that the source of their true knowledge and strength come from their Kevins-Beard.
Example 1:
Person 1: "Man, look at that beard!"
Person 2: "That's not just a beard, it's a Kevins-Beard"
Example 2:
I was thinking of growing a Kevins-Beard, only if I possess the masculinity, testosterone, and full-bodied confidence to do so.
In truth, since I have been under the influence of The Bearded One since I began studying economics.
When you try to type key board but your fingers are retarded.
My key beard is broken
I accidentally typed key beard instead of key board and my friend makes fun of me now