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Explosive diarrhea that smells like rotting vegetables.
Man the last time I ate there I got a batch of vegan brownies.
When two homosexual males are both "bottoms" and they must thrust asses together until climax.
The male scissor.
If it were not for the vegan squeezebox, Dylan would never ejaculate.
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A saying referring to the hypothesis that the semen of vegan men tastes better than of meat/dairy-eating men.
It also refers to the idea that vegan women have better tasting vaginas than meat/dairy-eating women
There has been some research supporting this but most evidence is anecdotal.
I ate out this vegan chick last night and its true what they say; vegans taste better!
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Pathetic excuses for otherwise tasty treats. Why even bother?
Vegan cookies just don't make any sense.
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This is when one person has chosen the noble and delicious path of veganism for themselves, but refuses to keep this amazing secret to themselves and thrusts their food choices on others whenever they have a captive audience, such as when you are invited to their home for a meal or even a special event. The masterstroke is when you offer to bring non-vegan food so that 100% of the other people attending can have a choice, the vegan's conversion ceremony will not be disrupted, so there shall be no non-vegan food welcomed at all. The double masterstroke is when you ask "what can I bring?", the answer is a vegan dessert, even though you could not possibly bring your favorite vegan dessert from any familiar place since you have never ordered a vegan dessert in your life!
When you arrive, the noble vegan will use familiar words, such as butter, cheese, meatloaf, chicken; no they are not taunting you. None of these items are anywhere in sight and none will be served. Your host may be performing a "vegan conversion ceremony".
I just attended a vegan conversion ceremony on Thanksgiving where the vegan host repeatedly extolled the virtues and joys of being vegan, while not permitting any non vegan food in the home (despite non vegan food being permitted on any other day), where they served only meat, butter, and cheese replacements to a room full of known and committed carnivores.
When a girl cracks an egg into another girl's vagina and cooks it using a hairdryer
Bro, I heard the economics teacher makes an awesome vegan lemon cake
SVS is a condition characterized by smug and well-timed references to one's veganism, citing statistically insignificant studies showing that vegan diets are healthier for your body and the environment--often while taking a drag from a cigarette, thereby negating everything they supposedly stand for and showcasing their vulnerability to worthless trends. Those suffering from SVS will often remind you of how dangerous pesticides and mysterious chemicals are, especially those that haven't been studied, and are likely to direct you to various wikipedia articles detailing conspiracy theories that are surely to blame for their recent development of a cough. SVS victims usually appear to be completely oblivious to the fact that every chemical in cigarettes has been extensively studied, and is, without any shadow of a doubt, deadly, dangerous, and the cause of their recent cough, suppressed immune system, and possibly their brush with derangement.
If you suspect that you or a friend may be suffering from SVS, direct them to your local clinic for a blood test and a pamphlet.
Tom: "Are you eating a chicken salad? Ha, yeah, that's how I used to eat before I took a few nutrition classes and did some research online. Chicken salads are officially endorsed by Monsanto, you know." *drags on cigarette*
Mary: "ugh... Tom.. you're looking kind of hipster lately... have you been to the doctor for a Smoking Vegan Syndrome test?"
Tom: *wheezes* "I try to stay away from doctors. Ever noticed how hard they try to vaccinate you?!"
Mary: *sigh..*
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