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Simon, usually a guy who grows a beard and has hairy mole man feet. His best friend is called John. He pronounces his name Siiiiiggghmon and drives a white Beamer. He has fathered >16 children with eight baby mamas.
Example:
Girl: I’m having Simon‘s baby...!
Girl 2: Me too!
Anxious woman: Why does that baby have such hairy feet?!
Old biddy: Ohhh, that’s a Simon!
gets zero play no girls ever talk to him or ever get near him, almost as if he isn't real.
he gets no bitches, his name must be simon
A boy, who believes he is the smartest in the world. He is a frequent user of mansplaining. He looks like a paedophile and a jew. He is not, but that is how he looks.
Any girl ever: "Simon, once mansplained mansplaining to me"
A guy with a super big dick, super funny and the best.
Simon is a guy with a super big dick, super funny and the best.
Duolingo pro. Skates in parking lots; poorly. Graphic Tee connoisseur. Lewd Telestration illustrator. Backseat driver. Shy for only the first hour of conversation and then transforms into a bloodthirsty horndog. Fart sound maker.
Sweet cock bro, what'd you name it?
Simon.
Nice.