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When u grow up with a best friend read porn together and think ur the man. Then he alludes to the fact women like large perfect dicks and how much better it would be for them.
When fall from grace and realise u will never feel safe in a relationship as long as he is around ur woman.
When u give up and watch them flirt.
When her joy when he is around is arousing.
When all u can think about is her pleasure.
When all she can think about is him.
When all u can think about is him.
When all u can both think about is him.
When she starts asking about him.
When his name is on both ur lips and almost say it whenever u want to speak to one another.
When she wants to marry u cause she know he won’t stay in that way.
When u give in and watch him make her cum so hard no one will ever believe u if u told them.
When ur raising his children and he is happily married his wife is happy, ur wife is happy, and ur the only one who isn’t.
When u realise ur addicted to the crushing reality of her orgasms with him.
When he controls ur and her with envy and u can’t help submitting.
When u realise no one noticed ur children look like him, no one knows what is going on. Just u 3.
When u wish u could die but the addiction is worth living for.
When u die and stand before God and he says “ why didn’t u trust in the small dick I gave u?” And u say nothing…
Wife: I can’t stop thinking about him, I see his face everywhere I go..
U: same..
Wife: he came over this after noon while u were at work..
U: he knows I have penis envy.
Wife: really? So he has a big dick does he?
U: :(
Wife: :)
When a girl strives for affirmation from her mother by wishing she had a penis lol
X: Gosh I wished I had a penis!
Y: girl that's penis envy
a certain type of shrooms that when consumed help with making the act of gooning and edging way easier
the best dose is 8 grams it will make you goon all over this is not a lie
after taking a large amount of penis envy i gooned for a good 13 hours
Something a lot of Irish guys have.
Girl-You have penis envy.
Irish Guy- I have the worst penis envy you've ever known about, I'm Irish what do you expect?
Person 1: what is that sticky white stuff
Person 2: it’s penis vomit
Person 1: That’s what I put in your mom last night
When the penis looks like the the first layer on uncooked Top Ramen Penis also known as Maruchan Cock
Sabrina-oh my God girl last night I went to perform fellatio you won't believe what the nightmares down there
Bria- I didn't have the best of luck last night either girl
Sabrina- he had Top Ramen penis I got up and left right away it looks like somebody took a uncooked Ramen noodle and somehow rolled it up that Maruchan Cock terrified me
Chinese Penis Torture is the act of repeatedly slapping your erect penis across ones forehead.
1) Hey Daddy, how bout' you gimme some Chinese Penis Torture?
2) Could you give a facial and some Chinese Penis Torture?
3) Daddy I love that Chinese Penis Torture! *Moans*