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A scale used to determine how infatuated you are with a certain someone.
1. They're pretty chill.
2. I'd ask them out to a movie.
3. I'd go out with them.
4. I'd shove my erect penis up them all day until we both ejaculated everywhere.
5. Marry.
Person 1: Bruh, you like that girl?
Person 2: Kind of. She's like a one on the crush scale.
Person 1: I got you bruh.
Male Masturbation
A man who is jacking off out of control.
Anita came home and caught Earl in the barn crushing chips.
the most satisfying and amazing dream there is. usually involves your gorgeous crush hanging out with you, holding your hand, liking you back, kissing you, etc. You never want a dream like this to end. The only bad part is that it's not reality. Having a dream about a crush liking you back means you REALLY want him enough to have a whole fantasy made up about him by your subconscious mind.
"I had a crush dream about Logan last night. He kissed me at the top of the Eiffel tower. He was in LOVE with me!!! EEEKK!!!!! I wish he actually felt that way."
When an older woman has a crush on a much younger man.
Muriel:
"I've seen Twilight so many times, I think I've developed a Cougar Crush on Robert Pattinson even thought I'm old enough to be his grandmother."
Audrey:
"You're preaching to the Twi-Hard choir."
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When people (mostly from the dark web) torture animals for other people's amusement (highly illegal)
Tim: Today I found the sexiest tape of some crush porn, it has a cat in it, too!
Edith: ... You're sick
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adj., used to describe a demeaning, overwhelming, deadly boring, or otherwise psychologically damaging corporate job...
"Working for Slowcubicledeath.com was sucking my humanity out... after the latest death march I decided to ditch that soul-crushing place and get myself a nice job at Microsoft."
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Adoring someone famous of the same sex to the point that the person would consider turning gay in order to be with that famous person.
Ryan met his Gay Crush Roger Clemens last week.
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