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Counter-calculize

The act of providing a guesstimate to a statistical question knowing good well that the answer is most likely incorrect, but also knowing that the person requesting the answer will not know any better.

It is also assumed that the question is ultimately irrelevant and therfore the answer is pointless.

ie. (Dan at HDQ needed those figures on the number of electric staplers needing repair by 5pm or else the TPS reports may run late, so I had to counter-calculize an appropriate response.)

by Waddamz December 23, 2009

7๐Ÿ‘ 2๐Ÿ‘Ž


Weave Calculation

Looking as far ahead as possible in light traffic to determine what pattern to use for weaving in and out of cars.

My weave calculation shows I can cut in front of this Toyota Corolla, speed by this Geo Metro, stay on the tail of the Nissan Titan to get in front of that Lincoln Navigator.

by Ghazellen December 31, 2010

7๐Ÿ‘ 2๐Ÿ‘Ž


Meat Calculator

An unintuitive, emotionally unfeeling, narcissistic, delusional, socially retarded species of sub-humans whose sole purpose of existence is to whimsically jump on the bandwagon of the latest unusual subculture to the next latest unusual subculture; due primarily to their ultimate lack of identity, all while living off of social security, and or their parents, trying to convince people that taste in art is objective, and playing ungodly amounts of Minecraft.

Those meat calculator cunts in engineering don't have the slightest amount of common sense.

by Andrew Carnegie Schopenhauer October 2, 2012

11๐Ÿ‘ 5๐Ÿ‘Ž


Calculator Watch

A key and crucial asset to Oscar, as it is not only used as a tool to show the time but it is a mathematical genius of an invention. Oscar used this to calculate the size of Rezs nose, and the sheer size of the Earth, Oscar single handedly became a genius just by using the amazing and genius invention of the calculator watch by Casio>

"oi Oscar did you use your calculator watch during the test you thicc lad"

by Rezisthicc April 19, 2019

6๐Ÿ‘ 2๐Ÿ‘Ž


Rice Calculator

A term of endearment towards any Chinese person, but primarily those who come to U.S. universities and achieve 4.0's purely to make their family proud.

While many consider "rice calculator" to be an insult, they tend to agree that it's normally a truthful statement.

Person 1: "Hey, you know that group of Chinese kids from class that always get perfect test scores?"

Person 2: "Yeah"

Person 1: "Why do they always speak in Mandarin and only hang out with the other chinks?"

Person 2: "Idk man, that's just what Rice Calculators do"

by AlohaSnackbarMaga April 27, 2018

6๐Ÿ‘ 2๐Ÿ‘Ž


love calculator

A love calculator calculates the chance that you and whoever's name you decide to put in the calculator, chance of working out. Got to lovecalculator.com to check it our for yourself.

The love calculator seems to think i have 0% chance of working out with Johnny Depp or Ashton Kutcher. I think it's the real deal.

by Desiree1990 September 28, 2006

39๐Ÿ‘ 27๐Ÿ‘Ž


Calculator Brain

Somebody who can do complex math equations in their brain in a matter of seconds.

Person 1: What is 356x751?
Person 2: Uhhhhhhhh
Person 3: 267356
Person 1: What a calculator brain.

by skmad1212 June 26, 2013