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When one wakes up in the middle of the night to have a bowel movement.
I woke up at 1am last night and took a sleepy Lincoln.
Swolbraham Lincoln is another way of declaring yourself to be a true swoll bro, much like 'Tyrannosaurus Flex' or 'MASSachusetts'. Often considered the pinnacle of your bench worship. Reps for Jesus
"Brendan had better be careful he doesn't get too swollbraham Lincoln, he doesn't want to remake the 18th Amendment of the church of iron. Reps for Jesus"
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Identical in appearance to your average Abraham Lincoln, an Evil Lincoln differs only in that he is entirely evil, with absolutely no moral core. Will kill abundently and pointlessly, wherever and whenever possible. Some varients sport glowing red eyes. Often roars "RAAARGH!" as he attacks. Their motivations and aims remain unknown, as anyone attempting to analyse them is normally murdered brutally and repeatedly. Some eyewitnesses claim Robotic Evil Lincolns exist, but this is unlikely and scary.
"Hey, Jackio, wanna hire Die Hard and get a pizza in? I feel like eating Ital- ARGHH!! NO! NO! My splean! GOD HELP ME! EVIL LINCOLN!! Please, God, let me - ARGHHH!!! NOT THE VARIOUS GUTS!!! Glughh.."
"Dude, you ok? Dude?"
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No, No, No! You're all wrong. A Lincoln Log is when you drop a loaf that's so big and solid that it by itself (without any t.p.) can plug the toilet. if the toilet doesnt plug then it's not a Lincoln Log. Officially it has to be one of those high pressure flushing public bathroom toilets for it to be a real Lincoln Log. You know, those toilets that flush with the sound of a jet taking off. Ever since my good friend Big Head Ed introduced eating regular fiber in his diet nobody has been able to create real Lincoln Logs, so out of traditional honour the standard has dropped to any type of toilet. And please people, lets capitalize the words Lincoln Log. Show some respect for its glory!
Mike: "AH! Yuck, somebody passed a smelly ol' Lincoln Log in this public washroom!"
Albert: "I kind of like that smell"
Other person in the washroom: "That's gross!"
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An institution that's based off of strict rules, biased supervisors, and banned words. Located in the south Chicago suburbs,you'd swear you were back in Nazi country due to the lack of reality and the abundance of censorship.
Man, when I got pulled over by that cop, I felt like I was back in Lincoln Way.
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An expensive leather packed Ford expedition that depreciates faster than any american made SUV.
Valet: "this is a nice expedition!"
matthew mcconaughey:" its a lincoln navigator"
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The badass actor who stars as Rick Grimes in The Walking Dead
Dude1: Who is Andrew Lincoln??
Dude2: An actor!
Dude1: Oh where can I see him?
Dude2: He is the main character in the walking dead! He plays Rick Grimes!
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