Deal

n. - a universal word that can be substituted for absolutely any noun in the english language.

v. - "doing the deal" refers to the act of rooting or having sexual intercourse

Will you hand me the deal out of the freezer?

Baby, how about me and you go back to my place and do the deal??

12👍 19👎

Non-Deal Deal

Non-deal Deal

These are everywhere. They are so-called “special offers” or “amazing discounts” designed to make you feel like the company offering the “deal” is doing you a massive favour but are actually making you spend more money than you would normally.

“Buy one – Get one free” or “up to 50% off selected products” (Please get a magnifying glass out at this point and read the microscopic print, i.e. the terms and conditions). T &Cs usually state a short redeem date, a minimum spend (10% off if you spend £100 or more – what kind of fuckin offer is that?) usually on something you don’t really need or want, like flowers or big cases of wine, products you don’t usually buy, things like glasses, or at a shop you never go to that much, like Halfords, Ann Summers, Threshers and M&S.

Me – Wow up to 50% off –let’s open this envelope and see what I can save money on!

OMG! It’s half price on a holiday to a private island on Dubai! Hmm, well I was going to go to Greece on a self-catering deal but let’s read on….. OK (squints at small print) – Must spend minimum of 1.5 million pounds/dollars etc, must be redeemed and holiday booked, within 2 weeks and holiday must be taken within 4 weeks. Travel insurance, spending money not included, meals not included, flight not included, must use pay toilet/bathroom and 30% service charge on all room service, meals in restaurants etc.

Oh OK that’s great – I’m saving 50%!!

17👍 4👎

deal

A word that can take a place of anyother word when speaking the deal language.

I have to deal you about the deal.

Yesterday deal and deal went to deal and dealed.

14👍 27👎

Deal or No Deal EXTREME

This is a game played by unusually reckless members of society in which the game of "Deal or No Deal!" is taken to the next level.

It involves taking small green and red stickers and covertly sticking them on members of the opposite (or indeed same) sex.

Green: Deal
Red: No Deal

If ever caught the usual plan is to lie through your teeth.

Man 1: Lets play Deal or no deal EXTREME on that woman

Man 2: OK

Woman: "Why are you putting that sticker on me"

Man 2: "Erm... I thought i saw it fall off and was sticking it back on again"
*Man runs away*

21👍 6👎

deal

as a noun - the goal achiever, or at least considered as a very skilled, serious and tough contender/opposition. (in whatever mentioned area)

'I'm working hard in the gym to show I am the real deal , and I'm here to stay,' said Joshua.

6👍 9👎

deal

wen someone or something is really cool, they're deal

1.* that skirt u wore 2day was so deal.
** thanx i got it from da mall
2.* you look so deal wit this on
3. *that dude looks so deal wit his shades on

12👍 23👎

deal with it

Dominant challenge issued by those in power.

Sure, if I was living in a box, on the margins of society, or couldn't do shit for myself so needed to complain about others who can, I'd be a liberal. But since i'm not a fucktarded atheist misanthrope, I'll vote conservative.

40👍 96👎