Tantric Television

The principle of maximizing the pleasure of a new television series, by delaying the immediate and empty gratification of single episodes, building to a climax when the season can be enjoyed in its entirety.

I've been abstaining for months from the new season of Mad Men so when the box set is out I can practice my Tantric Television on the couch with the girlfriend.

Unemployment Television

Definition.

The name given to the hours of tv when no one should be watching, namely 3am.

Obviously the name derives from the fact that anyone with a job or someone who attends school should be asleep and not watching the garbage that permeates the airways at these hours.

An interesting note to make is that during these hours, the likelihood of an error happening with a broadcast signal is infinitely more likely to happen.

First used by Rebeltaxi in his video “Top 10 Worst Animated Songs”

P1: Damn bro u look tired af man
P2: Shit man I stayed up all night watching unemployment television.
P1: tf is unemployment television

P2: 3am tv, when people who have no lives watch tv. Its all shit anyways.

Television Indecision

Television Indecision (TI for short) is the state of indecision about which television to watch while watching a sporting event at a sports bar. This condition tends to flare up when there is a tense or exciting game or fight on.

Guy 1: Man, I don't know which TV to watch, there are so many!

Guy 2: I know man, I can't either. I think I'll watch the huge projector.

Guy 1: But that big plasma screen is so much closer!

Guy 2: Man I hate Television Indecision.

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Heavyweight Television

Term used to define modern golden-age TV shows, particularly serial dramas, such as Breaking Bad, Game Of Thrones, The Walking Dead, Sons Of Anarchy, True Detective, The Sopranos, etc. (aka Heavyweight TV)

(term coined by The Void aka The Original Detritus)

Person 1: "Have you finished binge watching the last season of Breaking Bad on Netflix yet?"

Person 2: "Not yet, it's almost impossible to keep up with all of the great heavyweight television shows out there today"

caveman television

a campfire

Last night we all sat around the camp and watched caveman television

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Television Skies

The best band ever.

have you heard One For The Road by Television Skies yet?

television stoner

a person that will randomly laugh at anything on the tv even though it is not even remotly funny to others.

"dude what are you laughing at?"
"There was a thig on the tv...."
"What are you talking about.....dude your a television stoner"