Ted

V. Tedding. The act of claiming rights to, or calling dibs on a female, without the intent, ability, or know how to follow through on said declarations.
The act of tedding is normally followed by consumption of copious amounts of alcohol at the realization that the woman in question is NOT going home with the one who was tedding.

Don't ted that, she is way out of your league. Don't ted on my girlfriend.

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Ted

A guy who sits in the cubicle next to you and talks in a really deep voice.

"How does that guy sell so much stuff"
"It's because he's a Ted"
"Wow, his voice is really deep"

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Ted

A 12 year old girl.

look there is a ted!

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Ted

The deity that people of the Tibika religion praise. Ted-heads predominately reside along the east coast, and often praise their deity once a year at knife shows. God may be known as an all seeing, all knowing being, but Tibika is known as "a man with a plan". Ted-heads are predominately motorcycle heads who praise Ted by sitting around and listening to pink floyd.

"Yo man, fuck jesus, I praise Ted now"
"And now I lay me down to sleep, I pray Ted my soul to keep"

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Ted

A boy you meet at college at a frat party, spend three hours sitting on your bed talking to, then try to make a man out of but you can't because he has whiskey dick. Then you keep trying to hook up but he always has whiskey dick, and finally it works and you keep hooking up all the time and then start to act like you are dating. Then this man asks you out in his bed because you are too scared to, and you start dating and end up living up happily ever after living in Chicago together, he coaching the Bears and you being the first ever starting female quarterback.

I knew the night I met Ted}, my life would be changed forever

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teds

Abbreviation for testies
A term used to describe your testicals

kicked in the teds
me teds are sweaty
score teds
swollen teds

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ted

The South African politicians way of pronouncing "turd". Same goes for "bed" (bird), "thed" (third) etc.

Buthelezi: Eish, I just founa eh eh eh ted unner ma chair (translation: I can't believe it, I just found a turd under my chair)

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