brootal birth

When a woman gives birth, she does it screaming BREEE and instead of holding on to bed handles she does the metal claw. Child comes out sticking out its tongue and has the metal claw as well. Baby comes out with grill in mouth.

That person is so metal, he must have had a brootal birth.

20👍 5👎

Counter Birth

when you are put back into a vagina, the person who does this is a counter birther.

bradderz: "wow, look at steve's mum she's got well fat.
cam: "yeah she just counter birthed jeff."
bradderz: "unlucky, i wouldn't want to be up there."

8👍 1👎

Birth Tax

Well defined as birthday treat.

Happy Birthday Dude, When will u pay ur birth tax?

8👍 1👎

birth control

A way to save a lot of money over the next 18 years.

"Dude, I'm glad that skank was on birth control! I can't afford to be her baby daddy."

251👍 108👎

Devil’s Birth

A fiery, almost acidic like, shit that when birthed, leaves the sphincter a burning ring of hell fire.

Those chicken wings Sunday gave me a devil’s birth on Monday morning.

That devil’s birth feels like third degree burns on my rectum.

projectile birthing

A style of birth process where the baby shoots out of the mother's body and hits the doctor or midwife in the face.

Nurse Oullette jumped sideways, at the last moment, to catch the newborn baby. She gingerly stepped over the slumbering body of Dr. Whitcomb, he was unconscious, face dripping with red slime. Projectile birthing claims another victim.

4👍 2👎

Birth Poop

Forcefully pushing out a poop with agonizing pain.

Today could have been better... was stuck on the toilet dealing with a birth poop.