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the new official name of NFL wide receiver Chad Johnson of the Cincinnati Bengals
In court somewhere in Florida:
Chad: Hello, my name is Chad Johnson, I am a famous NFL WR and I would like to change my last name to Ocho Cinco so I can seem even more audacious and idiotic.
Judge: What a great reason! I agree! Court is now adjourned.
NFL Fanboy: Like lookz @ dis sick Chad Johnson Bengals jersey I got for my birthday! I am lykE tottaly going to wearz it to teh gAme my ParentZ are binging me to!!!!!11111one11eleven!!!
True Bengals Fan: There is no player on the Bengals named Chad Johnson, but there is a player name Chad Ocho Cinco!
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This started out as a tragedy in the late eighteenth century. It is a well known fact that mexicans love mayonnaise. A large steam tanker of this condiment was crossing the gulf of mexico from florida when a large storm occured, sinking the tanker. The horrified mexicans witnessed this and named the day of the sinking, May 5, a national holiday of drowning their worries with corona.
"O no-o! Did-o you hear-o about the cinco de mayo??!!"
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When a whole bunch of white college kids get together and have a kegger for reasons unbeknownst to them. These parties usually occur in the whitest of whitebread neighborhoods, and shirk far, far, farrrr away from what the people of Mexico actually celebrate.
Frat Boy A: Dude! You comin' to the Cinco De Mayo party tonight? We're gonna get WASTED!
Frat Boy B: Dude: I'm Mexican. That's effed up.
But I'm definitely coming.
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Contrary to a surprising public belief, Cindo de Mayo is not a holiday of independance. It celebrates the battle of Puebla(1862), when 2000 Mexican soldiers beat back 6000 French attackers under the rule of Napolean III. This is also the day that Napolean died. So far as I understand it, the holiday is celebrated much more in the US than in Mexico. We can thank the Corona beer company and college students for this.
"Cinco de Mayo is not Mexican Independance Day. That is September 16th."
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If you don't know what cinco de mayo is, it's a celebration of Mexico's 1862 victory in battle over France, although France, who previously had not won a war since 1066, later won the war against Mexico. However, since the Mexicans beat the French for this one battle, Mexicans took their cue from the Irish (who don't actually celebrate St. Patrick's Day, from what I can tell). The Mexicans said, "Okay, hey, let's do a pub crawl!!!!!' Except they said it in Spanish. Which makes me wonder why Mexicans would do a pub crawl, seeing as how Mexico doesn't seem to have a lot of pubs, seeing as how it's Mexico and not Ireland. But never mind that now. You should also never mind the fact that cinco de mayo is more widely celebrated here in the States than it is in Mexico.
It's cinco de mayo! Let's get drunk for no reason!
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Five dudes jerk off into the top of a sombrero, fill the brim with chips, and pass it around the party as a dip.
I didn’t know that the traditional app at a donkey show is Cinco de Mano.
How a stoner celebrates cinco de mayo, with a lot of bud or Mota, the spanish slang for bud
Dude its Cinco De Mayo wanna get some tacos?
Im thiking some bud, Cinco De Mota