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Moving from coffee shop to coffee shop in an attempt to get homework done. When a coffee shop gets too boring, crowded, or hostile (kicks you out), it's time to move on to the next one.
L: Dude, the library is closed for Labor Day but I still have that huge paper due tomorrow that I haven't even started.
G: Yeah, I still have some work to do on my economics project too. Wanna go on a barista crawl?
L: I'm totally down with that. Let's go.
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Meat Crawl - When a man is at the point of climax, gets knocked unconscious, dragged, and leaves a semen trail.
'Dude, me and this hot chick were getting at it, and then just when I was about to erupt, she meat crawl'd me!'
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The Puma Crawl is a sexual move reserved for only the most skilled and experienced sexual deviants. At its core, the puma crawl is a rollicking throat-fucking, but to comprehend the true essence of the puma, please consider the following scenario:
After a long night of heavy drinking, you reemerge from blackout to find that the tasty strump you were rapping to at the bar is now lying prostrate below you. As you assume the missionary position and prepare to displeasure her for 2-3 minutes before you fall asleep, you realize your semi-chubber isn’t quite perky enough to lay pipe. Rather than fumbling around until you successfully bury your half erect tube-snake in her vergina, you propel yourself on all fours towards her face and dump your whisky-dick dangler into her gaping mouth and fuck amply. Congratulations my friend, you have just successfully completed the puma crawl.
While the above tale was carried out with all the expertise, savagery, and insatiable sexual will of an experienced puma crawler, please do not underestimate the difficulty of this move. Legend has it that Vatsyayana (author of the Karma Sutra) pulled a hamstring his first time attempting the puma. The key to the puma is timing. If, amidst the whirlwind of your blackout, you are too slow, you risk rejection by your female counterpart. Experience has taught us that no unsuspecting harlot wants to look up and find a hairy sack of meat and potatoes rumbling towards her face eager to fuck. The goal of all aspiring puma crawlers should be to time your approach so that just as your partner realizes what is happening and begins to scream “Noooo!” in protest, it is too late, you are upon her, and her mouth is now conveniently open for a throat mashing.
While style certainly varies based on personal preference, puma crawlers have found that a low and stalking approach works best. It is from this form that “The Puma” derives its name. Similarly, animalistic grunts pair nicely with this technique. Again, the Puma Crawl is a very difficult sexual move. The surgeon general recently issued a warning that before attempting the puma crawl, extensive stretching should be undertaken. Suggested warm-up exercises included, but were not limited to: Irish car bombs, tequila shots, grain alcohol shooters, and double digit beer bongs.
Lisa: Ouuuch! What was that?
Brett (in a satisfied tone): "The Puma Crawl"
Lisa: Fuck that hurts! You got some in my eye!
Brett: (no response) (snoring)
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Not stopping at a stop sign completely.
Jimmy did the Jersey crawl around the corner and the cops gave him a ticket for running a stop sign.
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A house crawl is a day time party where you go from one house to another, usually lasting an hour at each house.
"Hey, are you going to the homecoming House Crawl in Madison this weekend?"
"Yeah it's going to be lit!"
The act of driving one's car at a shockingly low speed to the extent at which the driver could perhaps be mistaken for a paedophile looking for new victims.
"Mate speed up, people think we're doing a Paedo crawl"
It is a party at multiple apartments. Let's say the apartment crawl consists of a total of four apartments. You start at the first apartment on the list, stay until all of the alcohol is gone, and then you move on to the second apartment. You continue this until you have either had enough or have made it through all of the apartments!
Mostly in college towns.
The parties are usually themed. For instance, the apartment crawl can have the theme of "Around the World" and each apartment can have it's own theme. One can be decorated like Paris, another like America, another like Japan, and so on.
Are you ready for the apartment crawl this weekend?
Where are all of the apartments in the apartment crawl?
What is the theme for the apartment crawl this weekend?