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98% of men have dick cheese yet they don't admit it. Crusty Dick Cheese is basically when men don't practice good hygiene and the hot mixture of cum and pee bonds together and ferments for a long time until it turns into cheese. Natural and healty, its high in Glucose, salt and has low calories.
Slut1: hey b*tch you evah tried crusty dick cheese no?
Slut2: no shit, wtf is dick cheese yo...
Slut1: r u cereal? u no slut then
One who thoroughly enjoys smelling the genitalia of elderly women.
"Ewwww look at Erik, he is smelling that elderly women's genitalia...."
"Yea, he is a Crusty Muff Huffer"
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The act of a women shitting on a mans chest after he falls a sleep. By morning the skat should be somewhat dry, forcing the unlucky man to comb the shit out of his chest hair.
Linda shit on my chest last night after I fell asleep! By the time I woke up it was so dry and matted in my chest hair...the only way I could get it out was with a comb. It sure was a crusty comb out.....
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When one wakes up in the morning and realizes they can't open their eyes because there is dried semen stuck on them. Very similar to eye boogers (rheum).
I was so pissed when my girlfriend wouldn't have sex with me last night, so I jacked off and unloaded a torrential cum storm on her face. When she woke up, she tried to open her eyes, but couldn't cause they were full of man crusties.
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A genetic syndrome that causes your dick to become super crusty even while you age and the layers of skin build up to the point you hear a crunching noise when you fuck your wife/woman and it is incurable. It has been said that back when Christopher Columbus came to the Americas, he had this syndrome and many thought it was known as a severe STD that cause layers of skin to fall off from your dick and they used to think his semen crustified his dick, but nope he had it. If you have crusty dick syndrome, well i hope you are prepared to hear the crunch of your dick.
Steven:"dude have you ever heard? Mark has crusty dick syndrome"
When a male performs anal, and is left with shit and cum on his dick and then leaves it for a minimum of 48 hours.
„Mate why you scratching your balls“
„Well, I fucked this bird in the back door and I’ve got a crusty jeb end“
That one kid that is always I their iPad, which usually has a thick case and is encrusted in a thicc later of snot. Commonly seen in a Wal-Mart basket with Cocomelon playing on full volume from their YouTube kids.
Me: Girl, ur sisters such a Crusty iPad Kid
Friend: Yeah I know :,)