Having a cup of tea

Synonym for having sex. Often used when talking about sexual consent.

If someone is unconscious, don't give them a cup of tea.

"Where's George?"
"He's having a cup of tea"

Sometimes, people agree to having a cup of tea. But then, when the tea is ready, they might realise, that they don't want it anymore. Sure, that sucks, but you wouldn't force them to have a cup of tea.

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I have a boyfriend

Good for you

Jenny: I have a boyfriend
Max: Noone cares

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caught having a stroke

This is when a guy gets gets caught masturbating.

He was caught having a stroke.

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should have swallowed

An unwanted pregnacy

Yep I am preggers. I should have swallowed

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having a wafty crank

a term used to refer male masterbation

see also wanking, pulling your pudding, bashing the bishop.

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I have needs

A colloquial phrase signifying an overlooked state of demand, exigency, or indispensability addressing to one's response to oppression, selfless dedication, or inadequacy of a type of necessity.
See Maslow's hierarchy of needs.

"I work 10 hours a day, 7 days a week with minimum wage so i could feed my children and send them to school. I have needs too."

Girlfriend: "How come we never do it?"
Boyfriend: "Cause, you know about my disorder. You know.. down there."
Girlfriend: "I have needs, you know. Do you want me to go fuck some other nigga?"

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how to have sex

Fuck her right in the pussy

"I came out of my house and, FUCKED HER RIGHT IN THE PUSSY"-Fred

How to have sex

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