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A person who is notorious for texting while intoxicated. The term was made famous by Ivana Murleau's eBook "The Best Of Drunk Texter"
Michael, he's a drunk texter. Don't give him your number.
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Being so inebriated by alcohol you can no longer talk, walk or pretty much move. You are completely incoherent but you have not yet thrown up.
Look at that moron stumbling across the street, he's Charlie drunk!
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A mixed drink consisting of equal parts clear liquor of any type and Sierra Mist. 7UP is acceptable if you live in an urban neighborhood. Good for when you need to act like you're drinking water.
Nope, it's drunk water!!
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When you're drunk enough to type but not drunk enough that even the really slutty trailer park girl at the party is fuckable to you.
"Hey man, I got drunk as shit last night on a few beers and decided to not fuck Stacey again. Fuck that bitch!"
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A person that can have many drinks, become drunk, and still function perfectly normal. It's hard to tell whether or not this person is drunk unless you ask them to recite something.
Girl: I was so drunk last night but I had a normal texting conversation with my boyfriend.
Other girl: That's weird but you might be a functional drunk.
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calling or sitting out sick from work, after parting or drinking "Way" too much.
Steve got so wasted last night, he pulled a drunk out
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A state of being in which one is not under the influence of alcohol, however acts like a drugged piece of shit due to tiredness.
John: Did you know... if you pain your room is becomes smaller... but if you paint your house it becomes... bigger?
Mark: What is wrong with this guy?
Peter: Don't worry man, he's just soberly drunk.
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