puke in my lap and you get a smack in the face

If somebody decides to vomit on my jeans or shirt (shoes I am not too worried about) Then a short sharp smack in their face will ensue!

*bleuurrghh* *splatter* *dribble* *frown* *tense* *smack!* "ow, that hurt you fucking cunt!" *smack* "ok, I'll shut up!"

19👍 16👎

Wasn't getting enough out of the relationship

The guy I was dating didn't have a fat meaty dongle. That's what it means. In a poll of 100 women who have cheated on their boyfriends; this will be their response to the question "why did you cheat?" 100% of the time.

Some guy "Have you ever cheated on your boyfriend?"

Some chick "Yes"

Some guy "Why did you cheat?"

Some chick "Umm... I just felt like I wasn't getting enough out of the relationship."

Some guy "And what do you mean by that?"

Some chick "What I mean is that I was dating a guy and then I met a different guy who had a fat cock. I wanted the fat cock inside of me so I let him jam it inside of me."

Some guy "So then why didn't say that instead of your initial answer?"

Some chick"Because I don't want people to think I'm a piece of shit."

Some guy "Is that what a piece of shit would do?"

Some chick "......"

Some guy "Because if you're initial answer is just 'femanese' for your actual answer, then you look like a piece of shit either way. Like... It's a direct translation."

1👍 7👎

get down to brass tacks

Smoking weed; When it's time to smoke a bowl

"Its quarter after four? Almost time to get down to brass tacks"

"Hey, let's get down to brass tacks, pass me a bowl so I can pack one up"

2👍 29👎

somebody get this freaking duck away from me

Homestar Runner's exclamation in a deleted scene from Yellow Dello.

Ex: "Somebody get this freaking duck away from me!" shrieked Homestar Runner.

15👍 14👎

slide down to my spot and get some ones

to go to the bank and get money

im gonna slide down to my spot and get some ones. be back at 8:00

4👍 3👎

According to Sophocles, I gotta get outta here!!!

This phrase is used when you are caught up in your words, and aren't making any sense, and you need to get out as soon as possible, so you decide to turn to a famous playright to make yourself look educated and get out of the situation before it is too late!!!

"If you have a goat as a pet, it will eat everything!" "Well, DUH, that's why they call them goats!!!" OH god, according to Sophocles, I GOTTA GET OUTTA HERE!!!!

6👍 5👎

I'm gona go out and get me some

A term that means that a guy is going out usually on the town and get some pussy or in other words get some sex.

Woman: Not tonight I got a headach.
Man:Alright,I'm gona go out and get me some.

5👍 7👎