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The Jesus of Lizards. Long ago in a mystical land filled with unicorns and Zaxby's chicken franchise there lived a lizard with unusual powers. This particular lizard could lick twice an hour as opposed to the other lizards at the time whom were only capable of licking once per week. This lizard was soon relicked and worshiped among the community of fellow lizards. These lizards then enslaved a race of monkeys to construct temples that would please the Lizard Jesus. Lizard Jesus scale covered hide is now found on modern day cans of SoBe.
"Lick." Lizard 001
"Lick. Lick." Lizard Jesus
Originally used when your grandpa complains about something your grandma, Jeri, said or did
Commonly used by saying "Jesus Jeri" to anybody doing something spontaneous
Person 1: I just bought tickets to a concert for tomorrow!
Person 2: Jesus Jeri!!
A person on the internet that goes into servers and pings well-known Audio Makers and proceeds to call them "new-gen". Although Bacon Jesus claims to have made audios onto Roblox, it has not yet been proven. Bacon Jesus creates fake audios with other's intros and says he made a collab. Bacon Jesus is an atheist and sends dick pics to men on the internet. After someone says something towards Bacon Jesus, he thinks it's a good idea to call them his "fans" even though he pings someone in public servers so they can talk to him. It leaves people wondering, how old is Bacon Jesus and does he know the consequences?
Bacon Jesus: @.Robin newgen
Bacon Jesus: @4z newgen
Bacon Jesus: @L0zER newgen
Bacon Jesus: @66kDildos wake up newgen
Bacon Jesus: @yuki come on newgen
Bacon Jesus: @gabe73108 ur a dumbass newgen
Bacon Jesus: @Garzies newgen
Bacon Jesus: @Iunep newgen
Bacon Jesus: @L0CC newgen
Bacon Jesus: @linksdenis real newgen
Bacon Jesus: @LYNXDENIS newgen
Bacon Jesus: @Metacalled #ANTITRANNY newgen
Bacon Jesus: @PT5L newgen
Bacon Jesus: @pwn newgen
Person1: Bacon Jesus, you're gay.
Bacon Jesus: Ok fan.
When you take a desperate toke from a weed pipe that you've owned since high school without any weed in the hopes of achieving a high.
Yo Pepe let me take a Jesus toke, I'm parched.
Heels to Jesus
One of the nicer ways to to describe the penetration of the vagina via the penis. This phrase is best used around family and any other people who may find the words sex, fuck, bang, poke, pork, smash, ram, bump nasties, mix your milk with my coco puffs, and intercourse offensive. To be used judiciously among friends, families, and people you have sex with. There is not a more respectable way of describing the bump and grind than saying you've gone "heels to Jesus."
"Bro, I went heels to Jesus with Becky last night! I swear I had her speaking in tongues."
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When you take a shit, and you wipe, and the toliet paper is streak-free. This is also known as the "greatest feeling in the world". A JP in the morning, guarantees a great day to come.
It is referred to as a "JP" for short.
May is the official National JP Month
Jesus poops help save the world, by enabling the person to reuse toliet paper.
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