Jumping the Chair

Coined by Vox reporter Phil Edwards, it is the idea (or action/turning point) of a person, icon or celebrity turning from a rough and organic human to a polished, unrelatable and manufactured "ideal" being.

This is in direct reference to Microsoft founder Bill Gates, during an interview in 1994 with Connie Chung where he performed a stunt that he had manufactured and created (as a quirk/for fun) with the simple rule being that you jump over a chair from a standing position. When performing, he took a 1-step runup before jumping and promptly apologised afterwards for doing so. This fabricated act now comes with a fabricated apology.

Before jumping the chair, it is a bit of fun and a quirk/skill that holds no significance
After jumping, it is now a game that has been won, even while fabricated.

John: Do you want to see me perfectly crack an egg with a soup ladle?
Peter: Go ahead
John: I'm sorry, I am using my hands so I really am cheating a little
Peter: You're really jumping the chair there, mate.

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Jumping Jeans

A phenomenon caused by an erect penis, causing one's jeans to "jump" around.

He got jumping jeans while watching the cheerleading performance.

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jumping jacks

the act of spreading jelly on the inner crest of your leg while smearing crunchy peanut butter into those sweaty palms of your hands. When pb&j applied jump up and down while slapping your palms into the inner thigh with someone under you with an open mouth and break in the mouth.

very delicious way to make an excellent pb&j crunchy delight

"I'm full from all those jumping jacks Fred"

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bridge jumping

This is what happens when someone; generally a female companion backs you into a corner where there is nothing left to do but "jump off the bridge"

*Phone Rings*
Male: Hello?
Female: Hey
Male: Hey I was just playing COD can I call you back after the match?
Female: Yeah you can...but I will be mad.
Male: Gah.... well I'm going bridge jumping bye.
Female: Wha!?!? I'm sorry!

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jump off

a third choice; or other woman.

After i left my girl, i went straight to my jump off.

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Puddle jumping

Where a bunch of teenagers go to the high school after or during a big storm/rain, into the football field where the HUGE puddles are and jump, run through, swim and play in said huge puddles.

"Jordanian! Let's go puddle jumping!"

"Okay! Get Lily, Joe and Midg.a and we'll take my vehicle!"

::Vroom Vroom::



:::SPLASH:::

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window jump

what you're supposed to do when idiots are arguing about really stupid shit

The argument was so stupid I had to do the window jump.

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