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somebody: you lying
me: on baby jesus i aint lyin
ian trippin on baby jesus
on baby jesus yhu mad weird 🥱💯.
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The Jesus seam is the vertical hemispherical ridge across a man's testicles implying this is where God welded or stitched him together.
I got kicked right in the balls so hard I thought I split my Jesus seam.
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Male with athletic build that is well versed in a multitude of aspects. Typically always down for a party while still being able to be counted on in times of need. Most assuredly a Harley Dyna rider who's got cool facial hair. Can quote most any movie from the 80's and carries a knife. Bib optional.
The party was pretty stale until Steakhouse Jesus showed up. That dude ripped up an 8 ball and got everybody drunk. When a bar fight broke out he stopped it with one hand. He even got a tip from the strippers, man. That dude knows how to get down.
If you say that someone is wearing Jesus goggles, you mean that that person has been so on fire for God that they think someone is more sexually attractive because they too have the same level of passion for Jesus instilled in their heart:
"How did you manage to get such a beautiful girlfriend when you look how you do?"
"Brah pls- Jesus is my wingman"
""Why is she dating him, he ain't fly"
"Ahh man homie, she must have her jesus goggles on tiggggghhhtttt"
"Ahmen to that"
"Mmmmhmmm"
1. a simp for Jesus, very Catholic maybe too much. Probably very overbearing to talk to.
2. If you have such a fetish, why and please consider seeing a psychiatrist, you sick fuck.
Son: Father, I think I've developed a fetish for our only Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.
Father: It's great to hear that you have faith in God no-, Wait what?
Son: A Jesus fetish, Father!
Father: What the fuck is wrong with you? Get the fuck out of my house, you're not my son anymore I'm disowning you.
The greatest man who ever lived. About 2000 years ago he was born in Bethlehem to a woman named Mary and when he grew up he started the Christian religion. He taught the Jews of that day and soon he was delivered by some men who hated him to the Romans and was Crucified. While dying he took all of our sins on him so that God could forgive anyone of us who believes on Him. But he didn't stay dead after three days in the grave he rose again and after some final instructions to his 12 disciples he ascended into heaven and lives there preparing a place for anyone who will receive him. Here's how to receive him. Pray this prayer "Lord Jesus I am a sinner I thank you for dying for my sins I believe you were enough please save my soul In your name I pray amen" If you prayed this prayer and mean it you are saved.
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A meme that rose to fame when it was the 900,000th post on 4chan's /b/ (which now has over 40 million posts). Consists of a raptor's head crudely photoshopped onto a picture of Jesus.
Raptor Jesus went extinct for your sins.
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