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steakhouse jesus

Male with athletic build that is well versed in a multitude of aspects. Typically always down for a party while still being able to be counted on in times of need. Most assuredly a Harley Dyna rider who's got cool facial hair. Can quote most any movie from the 80's and carries a knife. Bib optional.

The party was pretty stale until Steakhouse Jesus showed up. That dude ripped up an 8 ball and got everybody drunk. When a bar fight broke out he stopped it with one hand. He even got a tip from the strippers, man. That dude knows how to get down.

by mΓΆtleylou June 11, 2020


Flamingo Jesus

He is a god among all people, worshiped by a very small amount of people he is very honored by his church.

He is son to Sky god and is the successor his. His Description appears to be a Pink Flamingo with a watermelon body with banana legs and a halo above his head

Person 1: Yuh bruh have you prayed to Flamingo Jesus Yet?

Person 2: Of Course!

Person 1: Nice! I don't have to lose a friend

by KingMIkel January 26, 2019


on baby jesus

its just somethin i made up

somebody: you lying
me: on baby jesus i aint lyin
ian trippin on baby jesus
on baby jesus yhu mad weird πŸ₯±πŸ’―.

by TyπŸ’€ September 19, 2020

6πŸ‘ 1πŸ‘Ž


jesus seam

The Jesus seam is the vertical hemispherical ridge across a man's testicles implying this is where God welded or stitched him together.

I got kicked right in the balls so hard I thought I split my Jesus seam.

by Sicrowell May 4, 2016

7πŸ‘ 1πŸ‘Ž


jesus fetish

1. a simp for Jesus, very Catholic maybe too much. Probably very overbearing to talk to.

2. If you have such a fetish, why and please consider seeing a psychiatrist, you sick fuck.

Son: Father, I think I've developed a fetish for our only Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

Father: It's great to hear that you have faith in God no-, Wait what?

Son: A Jesus fetish, Father!

Father: What the fuck is wrong with you? Get the fuck out of my house, you're not my son anymore I'm disowning you.

by Kazariiiiiiiiiiii-chan July 3, 2022


Jesus

The greatest man who ever lived. About 2000 years ago he was born in Bethlehem to a woman named Mary and when he grew up he started the Christian religion. He taught the Jews of that day and soon he was delivered by some men who hated him to the Romans and was Crucified. While dying he took all of our sins on him so that God could forgive anyone of us who believes on Him. But he didn't stay dead after three days in the grave he rose again and after some final instructions to his 12 disciples he ascended into heaven and lives there preparing a place for anyone who will receive him. Here's how to receive him. Pray this prayer "Lord Jesus I am a sinner I thank you for dying for my sins I believe you were enough please save my soul In your name I pray amen" If you prayed this prayer and mean it you are saved.

Jesus friend of sinners.

by djbeard December 16, 2017

3πŸ‘ 30πŸ‘Ž


raptor jesus

A meme that rose to fame when it was the 900,000th post on 4chan's /b/ (which now has over 40 million posts). Consists of a raptor's head crudely photoshopped onto a picture of Jesus.

Raptor Jesus went extinct for your sins.

by adeb November 23, 2007

508πŸ‘ 135πŸ‘Ž