Morbidly Retarded

Someone who is so totally clueless that they will believe absolutely anything you tell them. A lifelong condition which can prove fatal without intervention.

"I told Mikey that in order to jump start his car it needs to be hit from behind at 30mph. He's so morbidly retarded that he was about to do it until someone told him otherwise."

11👍 1👎

line-retard

the group of people at a grocery store, that automatically go to the register that has the longest line.line-retards are either too stupid or lazy to find the register with the least amount of waiting;most line-retards are either old or foriegn, or the best of both worlds, old and foreign

old people, line-retard

10👍 1👎

True Retard

An idiotic individual who has achieved an entirely new level of retardation in their actions or words.

Brayden: “Hey Eli, your girlfriend is here”

Eli: “What girlfriend? I’m not dating anyone...”

Brayden: *giggles*

Eli: “Congratulations Brayden, you have achieved True Retard. Enjoy bonus studs at the end of your life.”

10👍 1👎

retarded smart

Someone who is so smart, it's mind-boggling and makes others feel retarded in their presence.

Person 1. "Wow, man you like programmed that router in like 15 seconds and fixed the problem..."

Person 2. "Yeah, I have my moments."

Person 1. "Dude, you are retarded smart."

14👍 2👎

Half Retarded

A person whose brain only has half of all functionality leaving them retarded in the other half. Still can be reffered to as Retards

Hank: you Retarded
Nathan: Nah I is Half Retarded

15👍 2👎

retard monkey

When a male (or women with a strap on) shove his/her dick into there own ass and likes there boob and runs around town

Jim: I saw john run around retard monkey-ing he was doing it all wrong
Tim:oh how so?
Jim: He wasn't licking his nipple

14👍 2👎

Bull Retard

1. Possessing seemingly superhuman strength at the cost of intellegence.

Due to thier amazing fortitude and low center of gravity, most retards possess amazing strength and momentum, thus resembling a charging bull in both overwhelming power and underwhelming intellect.

1. Damn! Jerome Bettis broke through that line like a Bull Retard.

2. That kid in Special Ed is a fucking bull retard... he bumped me in the hallway and I went down like Peter McNeeley.

28👍 6👎