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When you commit a crime of conscience and do so precisely because you are entirely sane.
My attorney has decided to use the sanity defense in my legal case since all the other lunatics in our home town just stood by and did nothing while the multi-million dollar company dumped toxic carcinogens into the river!
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A defense tactic which seeks to excuse someone's behavior by evading responsibility. In the actual case, the defense effectively blamed the actions of the defendant on too much sugar derived from eating Twinkies.
I am not buying into your Twinkie Defense.
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When somebody who's on MY side shoots someone, but not when it's somebody on YOUR side!
Person 1 : "Yeah, Person 4 shot Person 56 in self defense because he came at Person 4 with a knife."
Person 2 : "Oh, shame. I hope he's okay."
Person 1 : "Oh yeah, Person 5 shot Person 78 because he did the same thing."
Person 2: "Person 5? Isn't he one of those OdD nUmBeR people? Crazy how murderers get away with anything in this country.."
Person 1: "What"
Flirting when some random person walks up to you and starts flirting with you while you are passively existing
70 year old woman walks up to a 30 year old man and says ,” oh you’re a big one”
He responds , “All over”
That’s defensive flirting
When someone gets too close to you, so you fart in order to deter them from getting closer.
"Me: get away from me!"
"Friend: What's that fucking smell?"
"Me: Sorry, I defense farted."
When you deny doing something wrong by admitting you committed the same wrongdoing only once at a different time or place.
Guy 1: I didn't wear black face in that picture because I only did it this one other time at a different party.
Guy 2: Yeah, great moonwalk defense.
1) When one has become overly intoxicated and the Zombocalypse is in full swing, zombies will not know whether this person is food or a fellow flesh-eater.
Oh man, i just survived that first zombie wave. I just got really drunk. Its the best zombie defense.