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When someone burps but it smells like it came from their arse...
Normally happens after someone has either eaten a curry, drunk bitter, or not brushed their teeth...
"Ergh, which one of you scruffy cunts just farted"
"Not me"
"Not me either"
"Well it was one you, either that or a face guff"
A derogatory term for a vagina, related to guff (bad smell) and the receptacle (vagina) the smell came from.
Ayup me duck show us yer guff bucket.
Or
Phwoor is that yer guff bucket I can smell?
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A "fruity" smelling trump, can only be pulled off by a man with a beard. Unfortunately.
A man trumps
Jeeze, can you smell that fruity guff? That bearded man looks suspicious.
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The pressure on the bowel, causing one to wrongly think a motion is due.
"I thought it was time to drop a chocolate hostage, but it turned out to be a bluff guff!"
When a fart (guff) is caught in the hand and then released into somebody's mouth as a tasty treat.
Mum: "I wish I'd ordered some dessert at the restaurant, i'm still hungry!"
Son: "Don't worry Mum, you can eat this if you like..."
--- Son farts in hand and forces it into his mother's mouth---
Son: "Guff Cake!"
Mum: "Thank you son, I feel much better now"
Son: "That's ok Mum, anytime."
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A fat, large, or over-sized head.
Generally a huge head!
Jam: Look at that guy over there.
Dale: Who? That Guff Head?
Jam: Yeah, his head is so big, last time he turned around, he put a shoulder out.
"The Incredible Guff" is the name given to all farts that fulfull the following criteria:
A. they are huge
B. they are dangerous
C. they can go through walls
D. they are angry
E. everyone knows one is in the room
At the ASDA checkout people begin to disperse in disgust.
<whispered> "It's THE INCREDIBLE GUFF!"