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A megachurch manlet is a massively delusional microscopic manlet boy who senselessly, sinfully and insolently dares to sully the sanctity of the house of the Lord with his abominable attendance, thereby bringing upon himself inexorable divine wrath because it clearly states in the Bible in Leviticus 21:20 that no dwarf shall draw near the temple. For shame! The sacrilegious sissy manlet would be well-advised to sacrifice himself by jumping into the depths of the manlet pit, in order to appease the venerated Randy Newman, the patron saint of manletism. If his derisory offering is excepted, then the preposterously petite midget monstrosity will be blessed by having his dying wish granted, being that Short People shall be played at his nanoscopic funeral.
Sophia: Hey, why is that tarred and feathered megachurch manlet exhaustedly carrying around that cross pendant on his back over there? Isabella: It's the devastatingly dwarfed manlet's just punishment following is immediate excommunication because he got totally wasted off of one sip of communion wine and then urinated into the holy water font. Sophia: Silly manlet boys. The Passion of the Manlet. Isabella: Hahahahaha!
A male that is 4ft11 to 5ft4 is a turbo-manlet. As a particularly stunted member of the manlet family, the turbo-manlet eternally resides at the very bottom of the social food chain. Inflicted with catastrophic levels of manletism, the turbo-manlet harbors what can (ironically) only be described as a colossal hatred for women and society but mostly for himself. Utterly insignificant, deeply insecure, inherently effeminate and unquestionably pathetic, the turbo-manlet represents the quintessence of manletism.
I think I just stepped on a turbo-manlet. Is there any manlet residue stuck to the sole of my shoe?
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The cerebrally and physically stunted myopic manlet is a microscopic mental midget of a minuscule manlet boy, who shortsightedly sees only the literally subhuman suffering of his own small-minded dwarven kind because, due to his eternal inability to grow up and be the bigger man, big picture thinking goes right over his pea-brained, little head. Deceased myopic manlets can often be found squashed flat as a pancake on country roads next to their close relative the, by comparison majestic, toad. Myopic manlets can easily be driven to venting their pent-up manlet rage and throwing a hissy fit with innocent questions and observations, such as: "Manlet detected.", "Nice high heels, my girlfriend has the same pair.", "Are you classified as a turbo-manlet? How tall are you?", "Aren't you the midget who played the manletservant Nick Nack in The Man with the Golden Gun?"
Manmore 1: Hey, why is that little girl crying in front of that beauty salon? Manmore 2: Myopic manlet detected. I think his new acrylic nails broke off when he got mauled by that chihuahua over there. Manmore 1: Lol, the victorious chihuahua even took the sissy manlet's high heels! Manmore 2: Manlets rise up!
The military manlet is an overcompensating manlet boy who, in a fit of Napoleon complex-induced insanity, has signed up for active duty with the United States Armed Forces. Here the useless and effeminate manlets are generally used as cannon fodder when deployed in the absurd spectacle known as the manlet wave attack tactic, but can also be traded as war brides, serve as portable human shields or can be used as an emergency fortification when stacked up as a barricade in lieu of sandbags. The military manlet is always keen to raise the morale of the actual soldiers in his platoon by donning an Oompa Loompa costume and dancing a merry jig atop a mess hall table as the surrounding military manlets clap in unison while dancing in a circle like the fairies that they are and all the manmores pelt him with height boosting insoles. As an encore Manletlyn Monroe performs smash hits such as "High Heels Are A Manlets Best Friend" and "Bye Bye Masculinity" to further entertain the troops.
Why is that pantsed military manlet lying face down in the mud over there? The silly sissy manlet broke one of his high heels while prancing around on the obstacle course and threw a hissy fit, so the real soldiers just left him there. Never leave a man behind - that obviously doesn't apply to manlets.
A grotesquely gnomish gaggle of ganged-up, overcompensating turbo-manlets who have, in a childish, desperate and doomed attempt at overcoming their crippling manletism, decided to form a midget gang. Once a diminutively dwarfed new recruit has been sexed-into the gang, it is mandatory for him to participate in typical gang activities, for example: tagging up turf by spray-painting garden gnomes at knee height onto garbage cans and pet doors, drinking Tall Boys and huffing Jenkem, prancing around naked except for high heels and assless chaps in their hobbit-hole of a gang hideout while towel snapping each other's posteriors in an effort to toughen themselves up, telling deeply embarrassing tall tales about how they used to be the biggest kid in preschool, injecting themselves with stolen bovine somatotropin in a futile and injudicious bid at escaping their inevitable fate of becoming a prison wife manlet once caught by the law and incarcerated and frantically praying in front of the countless Randy Newman posters adorning the walls of the manlet pit in their hobbit-hole gang hideout while repetitively reciting the lyrics of their favorite song Short People due to their shared obsession with the delusional hope of being blessed with an adult-onset growth spurt by their beloved God and hero Saint Newman.
Jessica: Lol, why are there a bunch of garden gnomes standing on the corner over there? Olivia: It's just a Short People manlet gang. Here, take my magnifying glass and have a closer look. Can you see that they got little hands, little eyes, that they walk around tellin' great big lies? They got little noses and tiny little teeth. Unsurprisingly they wear platform shoes on their nasty, little feet. Jessica: Oh yeah, they got little baby legs and they stand so low - I'd have to pick one of them up just to say hello! Olivia: Well, I don't want no short people 'round here. Jessica: Short people got no reason.
A hollaback manlet is a petite and effeminate, little manlet princess (a dwarfed male shorter than 5ft10), who has been so completely and utterly driven to madness by his overpowering manletism-induced small man syndrome, that the perpetually petulant and preposterously puny, girlishly gnomish runt of an Oompa Loompa Ewok sissy manlet fairy instantly erupts into comically childish manlet rage at even the slightest provocation (real or imagined by the quarrelsome manlet queen). Known for throwing hissy fits when asked to sit at the kid's table at family gatherings, crying himself to sleep every night because the microscopically minuscule midget monstrosity is even shorter than Gwen Stefani and furiously engaging in extremely embarrassing public verbal manletspeak catfights with other hunched hollaback manlets because all of the scandalously stunted sissy manlets are hopelessly in love with the same massive and magnificent manmore, the haplessly hateful hollaback manlet never falls short of radically raising the bar for mortifying manlet cope and devastatingly delusional mental midget manlet mathematics. Chris "Bagel Boss Manlet" Morgan is the perfect example of the hilarious consequences that inevitably occur when a high heels wearing hollaback manlet feels slighted in even the tiniest and most insignificant way, if only for the shortest amount of time.
Myopic manlet: Uh-huh, this my shit, all the manlets stomp your tiny feet like this... Manmore: Manlet detected. Halt! Instantly cease your manletspeak and scarf down your high heels before I perform a citizen's arrest by stuffing you into this half-empty cigarette packet! Don't make me call the Manlet Detection Agency, you spinelessly subhuman, short people got no reason, halfling Homunculus hollaback manlet!
Standing in stark contrast to the manlet's stunted, diminutive and girlish stature, manlet rage involves gigantic amounts of hatred, self-loathing, bitterness and desperation. Due to the horrendous mortification of manletism, the petite and effeminate manlet is extremely short-tempered, small-minded and eternally unable to be the bigger man. This deeply insecure and shameful behavior leads to countless interpersonal conflicts in the microscopic manlet's tortured existence which often result in manlet rage.
Why is that little boy throwing a tantrum in front of the escalator over there? Manlet detected. I think one of his high heels just broke. Lol, manlet rage - how immature! That silly manlet clearly needs to grow up before he speaks up.
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