Random
Source Code
Random
IT IS the desire of Jehovah's Witnesses that you become better acquainted with them. You may have met them as neighbors and fellow employees or in other daily affairs of life. You may have seen them on the street, offering their magazines to passersby. Or you may have spoken briefly with them at your door.
Actually, Jehovah's Witnesses are interested in you and your welfare. They want to be your friends and to tell you more about themselves, their beliefs, their organization, and how they feel about people and the world in which all of us live. To accomplish this, they have prepared this brochure for you.
Person: Look the true religion is coming!
Jehovah's Witnesses: Would you like to learn God's ways!
Person: Yes! You guys are not false and awkward like the Mormons but you base all your beliefs on the bible and don't create things like other religions. I was a Mormon and they are weird!
20👍 29👎
If you are in the same room with one you will definately know it! He'll be yelling and screaming, arguing with the Christian who simply wants to take a piss without being tapped on the shoulder and being told that he needs God!
Jehovahs Witness: "You need God!"
Christian: "I need to take a piss and the only things that'll help me with that is my penis and if you will SHUT THE FUCK UP!"
89👍 170👎
A person who believes that their only belief is the right belief, tries to inform other people and just ends up frustrating everyone.
Joe was sleeping in his bed at 6 am, then someone knocked at the door. Joe opened the door and to his frustration finds that it's another Jehovah's Witness.
21👍 34👎
A very athletic annoying person
Did you see that Jehovahs Witness run and jump over that fence when my dog started chasing him
SEE: Jehovah's Witless for comparison (they don't make the fence)
43👍 78👎
A Christian denomination... have very very very diffrent beliefs then the other denominations have. They are their chruches which are usually called a Kingdom Hall. They tend to knock on doors to get you to join them. You can do either one of three things.
1) Don't answer the door, they'll leave after a minute or leave some of their propaganda litertuare, either that or keep pestering.
2) Answer the door naked or screwing your wife... they'll get freaked out and run away. Or flip the bird.. or aim a shotgun at them. Or sic your dog on them.
3) Let them in and listen to their FUCKING ENDLESS RANT OF DOOM!
Bobby just called... the Jehovah's Witnesses are in the neighboorhood.
88👍 174👎
People who bang on your door at 6:30 in the morning to pass out various religious pamphlets/magazines in an attempt to recruit you into their "religion."
They are like missionaries without the nerdy bicycles, but slightly more irritating.
Don't take their magazines or pamphlets unless you desperately need something to line your birdcage with.
Jehovah's Witnesses> Would you like a copy of the Watchtower??
86👍 171👎
A christian congregation who are extremely devoted to the bible and want to do what Jesus said "Go ye therefore, and teach all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and of the son, and the Holy Ghost Teaching them to observe all thingswhatsoever I have commanded you: and, lo, I am with you always, even unto the end of the world." Matthew 28:19-20 (basically Go and mke disciples). If you tell them to go away they will come back because when armageddon comes you can't say no body told me. Just because you've studied the bible doesn't mean you know it. There is alot to learn by doing bible studies with a Witness. :thou believest that there is one God: thou doest well; the devils also believe and tremble" James 2:19 This is a very good scripture for one simple reason believing isn't enough. The devils of this world and past world belives does this mean they will be saved?
A jehovah witness came to my door
191👍 405👎