National spend time with your GF/BF day

On February 11th is National give your girlfriend/boyfriend attention. Spend time with them and talk to them a lot

Bf:”Hey baby I just Needed to tell you I love you.”
Gf:”Why are you giving me so much attention?”
Bf:”It’s February 11th it’s national spend time with your Gf/Bf day!”

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a big fat person whos also a gay ass pervert who spends all his time looking at porn

idk

Hey daddy, can i look at porn online at your computer pls i want fuck people real hard online :) Im a a big fat person whos also a gay ass pervert who spends all his time looking at porn

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why am i spending many minutes making random definitions on urban dictionary instead of doing something better with my life?

something everyone who has made more than 2 definitions has asked themselves but ha not decided to ever get help for. you are not alone.

*opens computer *opens urban dictionary *types in " why am i spending many minutes making random definitions on urban dictionary instead of doing something better with my life? " *realizes he is worthless

I'm a 20-something Hispanic man who has uncontrollable lust for women who spend over 100 dollars on collecting waifus and hours and realized that he can't collect a certain waifu due to random number generator

Translates to I'm Josie, and 100 dollars is an understatement.

I'm a 20-something Hispanic man who has uncontrollable lust for women who spend over 100 dollars on collecting waifus and hours and realized that he can't collect a certain waifu due to random number generator is something you wouldn't say on a first date.

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Spending less money

OH! BRILLIANT! I (THE GENIUS SCREENWRITER THAT SUCCEEDED WHERE YOU FAILED) DIDN'T THINK OF THAT! IF ONLY MY BRAIN (WHICH HAS RECENTLY BEEN CITED MORE TIMES BY MAINSTREAM INTELLECTUALS THAN ANY OTHER AUTHOR) WORKED MORE GOODERS!

Hym "Right and business owners should just stopped getting robbed! People should just stop getting murdered too! I make 150% more than my previous job but the price of everything has increased by 250% I guess I should just go to the dollar store and by a bunch of cheap heavily processed food so I can contribute to the obesity crisis that you care so much about and drink out of the tap like the peasant slave that I am! Spend every day feeling sick to my stomach until I earn the right to spend my own money on food that isn't poison. It won't get me credit for any of the things I've written. I know!

Maybe the business that refuses to give employees full-time so that they don't have to pay for health or dental insurance should be held accountable for the quality of life they provide for their employees because even though the skill required is low they need an indefinite amount of labor. Labor that consists of staving off the homeless crackheads and panhandlers that frequent the store and scraping shit off the floor because people (apparently) don't know how to use a toilet. I can't work more hours because the managers have labor quotas and don't have any ours to give. And that applies to BOTH of the jobs I'm working. I already AM spending less money because the only thing I pay for is bills and food and drink. I eat one meal a day now. 'WeLl gEt AnOtHeR jOb!' Says the retard. Even doing that would lead to a transitory period where I would run out of money because jobs never start new employees at the beginning of a pay period. Meaning it would take at least a month for me to get a full paycheck. Hopefully I can convince my landlord not to evict me until I get paid. I would literally have to save up money to be able to afford to switch jobs to a job where I make more money. Assuming that anyone hires me (which would also take time). You come here and do it. I can sit and regurgitate my opinion into the ether for and hour and I can do it better than YOU, so, let's see you come down to hell and do my thing. They have to weaponize schizophrenia at you too. Let's see it."

Virtual Spending

When a younger person than you has limited funds, ie pocket money and you have unlimited funds, ie credit card, therefore everything you pick up is 'amazing', 'awesome' etc in their eyes therefore you buy them. Purchases can be either for yourself or the younger person

Floral head band aimed at Tweens, yet you buy and you're in your 30's as the younger person your with thinks you'll look amazing wearing it, therefore Virtual Spending

you can't have your kale and spend it too

Kale is slang for money, it's not just cabbage, which is also slang for money, so you can't have your money and spend it too. It's my updated version of the idiom, " you can't have your cake and eat it too".

Put your money in a safe place son, because you can't have your kale and spend it too.