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When someone takes a dump in a urinal.
I had to take a leak so badly but when I got in there I saw someone had dropped a urinal turtle.
That nasty collection of plastic balls at the playgrounds of fast food restaurants across this great country of ours. Those balls aren't wet because it rained, it's because some kid peed in the play structure.
Child: “Mom, can I go play? I’m done with my happy meal.”
Mom: “Yes, just be sure to stay out of the urine balls.”
398👍 33👎
The requisite one urinal minimum you put between you and any other men who may be pissing at a row of urinals. It's a courtesy thing, and it's about proximity more than line of sight: shame shields don't obviate the need for a buffer urinal.
Of course, when you're in a situation where the buffer is impossible because there are more men than there are urinals (sporting events, concerts, etc.), the buffer urinal no longer applies.
I took my place in the row, making sure to leave a buffer urinal between me and the blonde.
86👍 5👎
When the mens room at your office building has not been cleaned for an amount of time that allows the rim of the urinal to collect pubic hair. The collection then appears like a mustache on the rim.
I almost puked when I had to use the restroom and the urinal mustache tickled my hand.
43👍 2👎
A dude who stands so close to the urinal that he is actually straddling it. His toes are often touching the wall that the urinal is mounted on, and depending on his pissing style he appears to be either trying on the urinal as a giant "Baby Huey" style jock strap cup, or humping an enormous porcelain goddess who's had a building built around her with only her peculiarly shaped vagina exposed...conveniently in the men’s washroom.
Urinal Humpers suffer from a combination of urinal anxiety and urinal zombie symptoms. They apparently believe they are disguising their urinal anxiety by their willingness to use a urinal, but due to their extreme urinal zombie tendencies, they haven't noticed that the majority of their fellow pissers don't walk away from the urinal with some other guys pubes on his dick, or splatters on their pants as if their schlong was blowing bubbles in a sewage treatment plant.
Hey dude, it's called a urinal, not a sperminal...it's for pissing in you freak'n urinal humper.
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A person who serves as a urinal for men by drinking their urine, saving them the trouble of traveling to a bathroom.
My human urinal drinks my piss so I don't have to get out of bed in the morning.
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When a person Drops a steamy loaf in the urinal and an unsuspecting patron walks up unzips and is startled by the brown banana starring back at him
"Whats wrong"
"Someone left a fudge monkey in the urinal"
"That was fast"
"Someone #2ed in the #1"
"Why the H did someone drop a urinal deuce"
45👍 3👎