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Random
A penis that has an abnormally tough outer skin. Also known as a chode.
"O. yeah let get in there...."said the man "Ow did you put it in yet..." says the girl "yeah it feels so good doesn't it!" "Um... maybe on your end i'm not feeling anything on this end..."
later that night...
"Yeah i was with this guy Nick Motta earlier he has such a wang turtle..."
When a man manufactures a dump so perfect that as it glides over his prostate it causes mild to moderate sexual release.
Bill: "Hey Steve. I did a huge dump this morning which was so perfect that I almost had a orgasm"
Steve: "ah, I see you have experienced the majesty of The Turtle's Kiss"
When someone/something is having very bad luck. As turtles have little to no luck because they are slow and if they end up on their back they cannot get up.
A soccer team keeps getting shots on goal, but just cannot get the ball in.
Max states: God! We have the luck of a turtle right now!
A black piece of shit the can't find his father.
When Tony the turtle tried to find his father , he realized that his father left for a hot white middle schooler.
A person who has to poop so badly that others notice. Like a turtle head is about to emerge.
"Why is that old lady fidgeting around like that?"
"She's doing the poop dance because she's a turtle burglar"
The state of vulnerability after a man nuts on his stomach and doesn’t have a rag on hand.
My mom walked into my room and caught me in a curdle turtle
a floater in the bath tub. made possible by a bathing child taking a dump in their bathwater.
"YOUR KID left another bath turtle in the tub. It's your turn to go clean it, Herman "