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The way Caleb Scholle carresses testicles while performing fellatio
Me: "Hey Caleb...jibblies?"
Caleb: "Mindin 'em" as in mind the jibblies...urban dictionary makes you write the whole phrase out.
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A tv show on comedy central starring Carlos Mencia. Deny
it that the show isn't funny, but it is side splitting,
gut busting funny as hell. Fucking racist though. Face it,
if you live in America, racism lives in the media and the
culture. "MoM" (or rather carlos) faces the racism and
doesn't give a shit about what you think.
Granted,
although Carlos makes some good points in his show, there
are times when he screws up and is an asshole who isn't
even funny at times and is just an offensive prick (this
is usually when he just stands in front of his audience
and yakkety yaks). People hate him, and people who like
comedy that doesn't turn a blind eye to the ignorance of
all the different people in the US love him (except that
moment when they get dissed by him, then they love him
again when he's ragging on another minority/social
class/personality).
He disses people like the chinese and
right afterwards he says something in chinese. He speaks
against many types of mexicans humorously and he also
speaks mexican. He speaks out against idiots and idiotic
behavior and says how he hates people who aren't educated.
Thats because he is educated, and knows what the fuck he's
talking about, although he says stupid-ass things at
times, and because he pulls the race card on humor 90%
of the time, it seems like he is just a stupid, crass,
racist mexican comedian when he is in fact really an
educated crass racist mexican comedian. By hating "MoM"
for being racist, you are missing out on racial issues
that speaks the truth in the best way; by making fun of
it. BUT, like i said, he can be just plain stupid,
offensive for nothing, and an asshole prick. This is the
truth about "MoM." Feel free to thumbs down this now and
enjoy these samples from his show (stuff thats both good
and bad)
Carlos: "In New Orleans(after Katrina), when white people don't have anything and need to take stuff to live, they are being needy. But, when black people in New Orleans after Katrina don't have anything and need to take stuff to live, it is referred to in the media as 'looting.' Hmmmmmmm."
(EXAGGERATED) "When white people drive too fast, they get a ticket. When BLACK people drive too fast...." (clip from helicopter cam *black guy runs on foot and is tackled by two pigs*)
(In a mexican restaurant skit)
*Carlos approaching a visibly chinese table of diners*
chinese person: We are celebrating Chinese New Year.
Carlos: WHY ARE YOU CELEBRATING CHINESE NEW YEAR IN A MEXICAN RESTAURANTE!??!
Carlos: It's back to school season! For back to school, i present to you Bad Ass Back to School Gear! In today's world, smart people get alot of ass. But in school, smart people get alot of ass---kicking! For those nerds to survive school, i present to you the Bullet-proof Calculator! Besides solving your math needs, in it comes 10,000 volts of anti-bully electricity! And for nerds who can't afford this calculator, there is also the pepper spray loaded pimple! *Nerd gets attacked by a bully, shocks the bully with the calculator, then sprays him with his pimples, chases after the bully*
*Again in the mexican restaurant skit*
Female Hispanic Diner: Oh! I see virgin Mary in my tortilla!
Carlos: *In Sing-Song manner* "Foooorgive me if i sound crruudde, but why is it that all mexicans see virgin mary in their fooooood? White people don't see jesus when they're eating corn on the cob, and muslims don't see allah when eating shiss-kabob!"
*A mock UPS truck pulls up (on the side says UBS)*
Truck driver gets out, opens the back door.
A hispanic maid, servant, gardener, plumber come out the back.
BLACK SCREEN WITH THE RIPOFF UPS SYMBOL---REPLACED WITH "UBS" SYMBOL INSTEAD
United Beaner Service. Employing brown people to do the work YOU don't want to!
Carlos: I love America. I love how America does things. Here is an example. Lemme show you how our military racially profile! Lets see, do we have any military guys in the audience? You, you, you, you, hey you sir, what branch are you in? "The army." The army? ok. Lemme show you how our army works. They put white people in the airborne to jump outta planes. See, Black people and hispanics, we DON'T jump outta planes!!! No No! But for white people, it's the X-Games Bitch! YEah! EXTREME! WoohOO! Now, our tanks are the best. We take down 75 of the enemy's before they take out even one of ours. Do you know who are driving our tanks? Black people! What are tanks but super-sophisticated, hi-tech Drive-By Machines! Yeah Brothers! *carlos hi-fives a black audience guy* Now. We got bombs that can hit this itty-bitty target right here *points to the mic-holder* Do you know who is launching those accurate bombs? Asians Are! Mathetmathical precision baby! Yeah!
*In a talk-to-people-on-the-street thingy---topic is to speak whatever is on your mind about anything using a microphone.*
*starts*
Carlos on the street in public using megaphone: Don't ever give a beaner a megaphoone!
Carlos talking to an Indian guy: Hey, aren't you tired of people thinking you're muslim when you're hindu? Don't you hate it when they think you're a terrorist or something?
Hindu guy: Yes, of course, all the time!
Carlos: So you wanna speak your mind to all those ignorant people out there?
Hindu guy w/ megaphone in public: Attention everyone! I am NOT a TERRORIST! I am NOT a TERRORIST! *crowd draws, people stare but keep their distance*
Carlos talking to a black guy: Hey, i got an idea. I'll play an indian guy who works in a 7-11 and you speak to me what's on your mind about people like me.
Black guy: How come you won't let me put alot of cheese on my nachos whenever i buy them?
Carlos speaking with an indian accent: no no no! that cheese is for those nachos only! you're not supposed to put overflowing cheese to take home and put on your burger! no no!
Black guy: The sign says free cheese! when theres free cheese i put as much cheese as i want!
Carlos: Thats not how its supposed to be! that cheese is for nachos ONLY!
black guy: When i buy my nachos, i want all the cheese and chili that i want! The sign says free!
Some bad moments when carlos is an asshole:
-Carlos flips off a random white person after making a racially charged joke against white people being racist. The white person took it well and just smiled, but it was still unjustified.
-"Asians have small penises. Now, now, don't get mad at me. I'm not god. God created them, not me." *Note, this part was technically from Last Laugh 2005, but it involved that turd mencia, so it is included here.
-At the beginning of a street-talk- asking-people-thingy, the title of the thing is called "Ask Whitey." When carlos qued the street interviews with white people, it showed a screen that said "Ask Whitey" and it showed kkk members on it. Not all white people are racists asshole carlos. Not all asians have tiny penises you prick-shit. Get your act together and you will be respected more. I like you cause you're funny, but not for anything else it seems.
BOTTOM LINE: Mind of Mencia makes fun of all minorities, and unlike Dave Chappelle's Show, which is funny but mainly focused on black people, MoM includes everyone else, including...well, everyone else.
Mencia can be a faggot at times, but you will laugh. Don't deny it. His show is funny. One of the best to laugh to.
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A statement that seems innocent when you hear it but when you think of it later it makes you think of something gross or disgusting.
I thought were talking about jogging but later his mind bomb went off on me and I pictured the anal rape he was referring to.
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to telepathically have sex with someone
to rape someone by form of telepathy
i didnt touch her, but we mind fucked from across the room all night long. wow.
yes, sally is a victim of mind fuckage
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-Oh you kissed her? don't you fancy a shag with her?
- Come on, man. Don't be that much dark-minded.
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Great fucking show, many people hate him and his show because they are pussies and can't take a joke. And you know what? He does not give a shit about what about the people who hate him. He is not racist, god damn. Wow so he cracks stereotype jokes alot, who cares? He is hilarious and open minded. Dried pussy dipshits can't handle a joke so they write bullshit hatemail to make themselves look like an idiot. His best skit IMO is the Confucious Carlos, I pissed my pants watching that. If you like comedy you will love this show.
He is fucking funny as hell. If you like Dave Chapelle, Chris Rock or any comedian who cracks on racism have no reason to hate Carlos. People who hate him can get bent and munch my taint. He is hilarious, plain and simple. Don't like the show don't fucking watch it instead of writing bullshit hatemail that he doesn't give a shit about.
Most of the people who bitch about him being racist, god damn get a life. Dave Chapelle makes fun of white people all the time, does he get called racist? No, he is called funny and hilarious. So why is it any different if Carlos does it? It's because you are the racist assholes.
Anyway the show is the funniest thing late at night along with Dave Chappelle. He decieves the bullshit in the world today and exposes how fucked up and insecure most dumbasses are. Hell, in his routines he even reveals how much of a dumbass he can be.
If you are open minded person, and can handle offensive jokes, give Mind of Mencia a watch, I guarentee a good laugh.
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I just got a mind boner; what if socks were self drying and cleaning!
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