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A professional driver,usually much slower than the others. Reaching a height of of 5 foot, most sit on a phone book or booster chair while driving. Known for leaving some of their loads on highways & interstates as a way to find there way back. Very competitive although always loses. Always wanting to be employee of the month but only ever achieving runner-up.
Look at Turtle Todd he thinks he's going to win
A penis that has an abnormally tough outer skin. Also known as a chode.
"O. yeah let get in there...."said the man "Ow did you put it in yet..." says the girl "yeah it feels so good doesn't it!" "Um... maybe on your end i'm not feeling anything on this end..."
later that night...
"Yeah i was with this guy Nick Motta earlier he has such a wang turtle..."
When a man manufactures a dump so perfect that as it glides over his prostate it causes mild to moderate sexual release.
Bill: "Hey Steve. I did a huge dump this morning which was so perfect that I almost had a orgasm"
Steve: "ah, I see you have experienced the majesty of The Turtle's Kiss"
When someone/something is having very bad luck. As turtles have little to no luck because they are slow and if they end up on their back they cannot get up.
A soccer team keeps getting shots on goal, but just cannot get the ball in.
Max states: God! We have the luck of a turtle right now!
a floater in the bath tub. made possible by a bathing child taking a dump in their bathwater.
"YOUR KID left another bath turtle in the tub. It's your turn to go clean it, Herman "
A black piece of shit the can't find his father.
When Tony the turtle tried to find his father , he realized that his father left for a hot white middle schooler.
The state of vulnerability after a man nuts on his stomach and doesn’t have a rag on hand.
My mom walked into my room and caught me in a curdle turtle