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The feeling that you are getting dumber by the minute, not from the beer, but from the stupid person near you that won't shut up.
"The second-hand stupid from Billy's girlfriend is frying my brain. I can't think anymore."
9👍 1👎
When receiving oral sex it is a common courtesy to let the woman know that you are close to orgasm, so she doesn't blind herself or choke to death on your seed...
"Are you still seeing Sloop??"
"I don't think so; I failed to give her the ten second tap last weekend and she hasn't returned my calls since then"
"Bummer"
7👍 1👎
A car that can drive a quarter mile in as fast as 10.999-10.000 seconds
A car that can drive a quarter miles in less than 10.000 seconds is considered a 9 second car, or an 8 second car, and so on depending on how fast the car drives in the quarter mile.
10 second cars are total weaksauce, they are just all the rage on the internet.
7👍 1👎
Basically, it states that it is impossible for entropy to decrease in a closed system.
"So you say the second law of thermodynamics disproves organic evolution, do you? Do you even know what the FIRST law is?"
35👍 13👎
~noun; A term used when an individual purposefully finds a sexual partner whom he/or she doesn't know; during intercourse the individual lies and whispers into the unknown partners ear, "I forgot to tell you, I have AIDS" The object is to stay on top for eight seconds without being "bucked" off.
"I met a girl at a bar last night and gave her the Eight Second Rodeo, she kicked me in the nuts so hard I flew back at least two feet... I didn't even make it two seconds, man."
First guy, "Dude, I'm in trouble. I hooked up with a girl last night and she told me she had AIDS while we were having sexual intercourse and then wouldn't get off of me."
Second guy, "You're okay man, she just gave you the Eight Second Rodeo."
24👍 8👎
The five seconds that seem like a year when you hear someone opening your bedroom door whilst you are masturbating. It usually consists of closing the porn website, finding another website, pulling up your underwear and pants and trying not to cum. Not a good feeling.
Jesus, i felt like i was going to have a heart attack when i heard my mom opening my door during my midnight wank. Luckily I have mastered the 5 seconds of fury.
17👍 5👎
When you believe you are taking a girl's virginity, but find out later she had lost it already
I got second harvest on this girl last night... It's was great, until it wasn't
6👍 42👎