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The inconsequential deterioration of the inner lining of the human anal cavity, caused by intense homosexual intercourse.
Dallas: Damn, man, I've been suffering from some intense Porp Flu ever since I hired that whore Rocky H.
Carson: Aw, for real? Didn't you use a butt-condom?
Dallas: I like raw johnson myself.
A unique strain of COVID-19 that is localized within the ft. Lauderdale region. Symptoms include: reserving a table everywhere you go, with no visible health issues such as a cough or a fever.
VIP Hostess: I really hope that guy with glasses with a beard comes in this weekend
Hostess 2: why?
VIP: Hostess: he pays my bills because he's got the Laudy flu
Being sick and realizing that it's because you're pregnant.
Jenny: I've been sick for the past three weeks.
Betty: Sound like you have the baby flu.
A loo roll that has been panic bought due to a viral outbreak
Folks are hoarding they’re flu rolls like crazy I can’t get any, supermarket shelves are empty, had to buy extra copies of the daily mail
When you are at home, sick from work/school with the Flu. You have no energy, but gather the strength to masterbate. Ideally, you do not use the same Kleenex that are riddled with mucus- or you do
Jeff- Bro what did you get up to last week? We missed you at work
Jeffrey- Boss, I had the Flu, I did manage to have a Flu Nut though, which eased the symptoms
When you get flu from a night out at the clubs. More specifically from the fortitude valley clubs.
Jaz: “man you don’t look to good”
Cas: “must be valley flu from this weekend”
A condition where one feels the inexplicable urge to smoke, drink a certain type of alcohol or do a certain drug because of the main character(s) of a TV show they recently watched who use it recurrently throughout the story.
First observed in Peaky Blinders (hence the name) and the massive epidemic of YouTube comments of fans describing their ailment and the symptoms; most notably an impulsive need to light a cigarette alongside Tommy Shelby.
(YouTube comment #1)
Nobody:
Tommy: Lights a cigarette
(YouTube comment #2)
Me: Trying to quit smoking for 3 weeks now
*Watches the first episode of the show*
Me: Ah, shit. Here we go again.
Jake: (Watches Peaky Blinders)
Mike: Jake, since when did you start smoking?
Jake: I dunno, man. I've started waking up with a pack of cigarettes in my hand and randomly lighting up. I think I might have the Blinder's flu.