Random
Source Code
Random
When your weightlifting partner, who is spotting you during the bench press, lets a testicle slip down and out of his nutter shorts.
My workout was going great this morning until Dave gave me a Morning Sunshine.
2👍 7👎
Those mornings when your typical morning shit is just not enough. This situation arises most frequently after a night of heavy drinking or a late night burrito run.
In a typical two-shit morning, the second sequence arrives unexpectedly, making you late for work/class/court-ordered community service.
You: Sorry I'm late boss, I had one of the two-shit morning. You know how it goes.
Boss: Say no more. I was late too, also on account of a two-shit morning.
Check with your human resources office/principal/parole officer to make sure that a two-shit morning is recognized as a valid excuse for tardiness.
The morning after a late night; characterized by a wet toothbrush because you brushed your teeth just a few hours ago when you went to bed. Not necessarily but usually waking up for work after a late night of drinking.
Adam: You look like hell. Did you even sleep between the party and work this morning?
Justin: Yeah but it was a wet toothbrush morning.
a sexual position in which the woman does a hand-stand and the man supports the womans' legs while giving her oral sex
I decided that I was going to treat my wife to a principals morning tea
1) Inordinately great sex in the morning. As strong and powerful as a Bison.
2) A flavor of tea...to be had in the morning after having sex.
Man, I got two smashing cups of morning thunder today, Finneus.
30👍 246👎
While having sex, cum into the recievers mouth and make them swallow it. Then make them vomit. The shit that comes out should look like porrige. If not, you havent done it right.
Well...all the others are totally stupid!
I fixed your sister a Morning Breakfast. It sure was funny
3👍 14👎
Masturbation in the AM. Generally results from morning wood
"I woke up to a nice my morning jack-it"... "you mean like the band?" ... nope
56👍 4👎