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Random
When two or more people, who are not twins in the traditional sense, share a birthday.
Chris, Tasha and Kara's husband all share the same birthday making them birthday twin pals. How freaky!
2👍 1👎
On your Birthday, take the number of birthday greetings you get on Facebook and divide by total number of friends.
I have a Birthday Friend Ratio close to 1 because I don't add acquaintances nor do I accept their friend requests.
2👍 1👎
When you are no longer in contact with a person, but they still mail you a birthday card on your birthday!?!?
We haven't talked in months, but apparently we are on Birthday Card Status!
2👍 1👎
When you cum on someones ass and then stuff candles in their anus and light them
I gave my girlfriend a hot birthday cake for her 14th
2👍 1👎
When someone is your facebook friend but never posts or likes and you delete them on their birthday...
"Facebook birthday notifications "
I don't even remember adding that person...
unfriend
"Happy Birthday Felicia"
Bye Felicia
3👍 1👎
When your brother sharts all over your bed and pillows in attempt to make you dream of shitty somalian birthday parties.
JAKE WHAT THE FUCK YOU JUST SOMALIAN BIRTHDAY PARTY-ED MY WHOLE FRIGGN BED!?!?!?
9👍 12👎
On your girlfriend or wife's birthday, you buy her favorite birthday cake and feed it to her. About a half hour later, you have sex with her doggie-style, and while penetrating her vagina,you stick a ping-pong paddle, or other flat, round shaped object, into her anus. She then takes a dump that comes out in the shape of a cake. You flip her on her back, placing the "birthday cake" on her stomach, adding a lit candle or two. You then fuck her missionary style, and when you cum you ejaculate "frosting" all over the birthday cake, also extinguishing the lit candles. Happy Birthday, Sweetie!
Tonight I'm going to give my girlfriend The Happy Birthday Cake!
12👍 20👎