ASHLAAAYYY!!!

A word shouted in fear when death is inevitable.
Usually cried out in a guttural roar.

Ash was very excited, it was terribly hard to sleep that night. She was looking forward to a big birthday celebration the next day. A party with all the spoils of a Birthday awaited tender Ash. As she closed her eyes, awaiting precious REM sleep, she was interrupted by a loud noise outside the house. "The fuck?" Ash puzzled. The sound was much more aggressive the second time. "Cunt's fuck! Sounds like mi car" Ash got up to investigate. She peeped through the blinds...everything was normal. "Time to get forty winks" she said to no one. "But first" She ventures outside to see if the car is locked. As she creeps closer a balding, toothless bogan from her past appears! "Ya gotsta holp mi I'm neeeed cash for droogs!!"
The wank stain says incoherently. Ash quick to react, jumps in the car, turns the engine over to escape. "Don think bout leavin papa noids his fix!" The man shouts in desperation. The man hangs on to the car door as Ash tries to reverse. "Doooooggg" he screams. Ash fangs it. The man slips from the car door, his head now underneath the wheel "ASHLAAAYYY!!!" he screeches in bogan speak. Almost seeing his demise, Ash parks and steps out of the car. Maybe she has forgiven him? She walks toward him with a smile, he is ready to embrace her. Instead she quickly boots him in the nads, spits on his thinning hair, shoves 50 cents up his anus and runs inside. Ash has the best sleep she has ever experienced that night.

ASHLAAAYYY!!!

A word shouted in fear when death is inevitable.
Usually cried out in a guttural roar.

Ash was very excited, it was terribly hard to sleep that night. She was looking forward to a big birthday celebration the next day. A party with all the spoils of a Birthday awaited tender Ash. As she closed her eyes, awaiting precious REM sleep, she was interrupted by a loud noise outside the house. "The fuck?" Ash puzzled. The sound was much more aggressive the second time. "Cunt's fuck! Sounds like mi car" Ash got up to investigate. She peeped through the blinds...everything was normal. "Time to get forty winks" she said to no one. "But first" She ventures outside to see if the car is locked. As she creeps closer a balding, toothless bogan from her past appears! "Ya gotsta holp mi I'm neeeed cash for droogs!!"
The wank stain says incoherently. Ash quick to react, jumps in the car, turns the engine over to escape. "Don think bout leavin papa noids his fix!" The man shouts in desperation. The man hangs on to the car door as Ash tries to reverse. "Doooooggg" he screams. Ash fangs it. The man slips from the car door, his head now underneath the wheel "ASHLAAAYYY!!!" he screeches in bogan speak. Almost seeing his demise, Ash parks and steps out of the car. Maybe she has forgiven him? She walks toward him with a smile, he is ready to embrace her. Instead she quickly boots him in the nads, spits on his thinning hair, shoves 50 cents up his anus and runs inside. Ash has the best sleep she has ever experienced that night.