bachelor shower

An application of deodorant, in lieu of an actual shower.

I was a bit stinky this morning, but a quick bachelor shower sorted that out. 'Til lunchtime, anyway.

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Bachelor Shower

The culmination to one long, ridiculously dirty filled fantasy before the ultimate reality of marriage. The bachelor shower is a time for consolidation and reflection of the fact that the two nasty hookers you thought were hot, weren't. A time to wash away all the coke and weed out of your system. A time to cleanse yourself of the stripper sparkles, and vaginal residue. Lastly, a moment to figure out a way to say you can't buy the house you wanted, although this does not specifically need to happen for the shower to be considered a success.

MARY - Honey, how was the bachelor party in Vegas?
TED - (Pauses)More like a bachelor shower.
MARY - What was that honey?
TED - (Shakes his head) Eh, never mind, never mind.
MARY - OK,(puzzled)So, do you want to go turn in the paperwork on the mortgage for our new(Breaks a tear of happiness) Dream home!
TED - About that...

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