Beardson's Law

A phenomena whereby the browner a person is, the higher the likelihood their smoke alarm batteries need to be replaced.

For example, when observing a black person in their natural habitat, if you listen closely you will likely hear the distinct low battery alert chirp of a smoke-alarm.

I was on Omegle last night and talked to a bunch of black people. I could hear the chirp of a smoke-detector low battery alarm in every one of their houses. Beardson's Law, am I right?

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Beardson's Law

The shorter the hobbit, the redder the face.

Beardson's Law accurately identifies his beet red face.

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