Beehive Betty

A middle-aged female,typically from a small town in the American south or midwest,who is very old-fashioned yet wears more red lipstick & blue eyeshadow than a hooker,can't make a decision without a man,talks so slow that you'd have time to take a nap before they even finish one sentence,carries a huge purse nearly as big as their husband's '71 Oldsmobile,spends hours in a local 'mom-&-pop' beauty shop having their hair teased about 9" high,gossips constantly and over-uses phrases like "oh,dear!","I swear!",and "I do declare!",uses enough Aqua Net hairspray to destroy the ozone layer,and is usually married to a Dead Elvis whom she met in high school back in '59.(see Dead Elvis)

"My aunt Doris is a real Beehive Betty,she says 'dear,swear,and do-declare' at least 5 times a minute,and spends all day at Lucille's Beauty Shop!"

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