Bologna Man

The bologna man is a "footballer" from Portugal, who stat pads mickey mouse goals against small teams like Bologna, Lecce, and Crotone, but then decides to ghost in the champions league against Ajax, Porto, and Lyon.

He also has an instinct to believe that the penalty area is a swimming pool and tends to dive in it.

I was born and raised in Bologna. My grandfather used to tell me stories about bologna man,a goblin from Portugal that travels to Italy when Bologna is playing. He scores 6 penalties and then disappears until the next Bologna game! I still have nightmares that he’s hiding in our stadium!

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