The nonsensical errands you send your parents on when you need to get alone time at home to masturbate.
"Hey Dad, I need you to run to the store and get me some deodorant and some CD-Rs, also I think we need butter."
"Alright I'll be back in a bit."
Later, cock in hand:
"Ugh, yes, totally just sent Dad on a butter hunt. Ooh..."