Claire Friendly

Term used to describe a noun which enhances the wellbeing of, or does not cause emotional or physical harm to a Claire.

Synonyms: eco friendly, gluten free, dairy free, organic, unscented, art, dancing, chicken stock, mutts, nature walks, home cooking, granny panties, warm lighting, Gua Sha, herbal remedies, clothes that feel like pajamas, reduce reuse recycling, GAPS foods, heating pads, warm weather, cuddles, traditional Chinese medicine, probiotics, using white vinegar to solve all of your problems.

Antonyms: gluten, synthetic fragrances, bras, fluorescent lighting, dairy, horrors/psychological thrillers, pesticides, fast food, sports, chewing gum, refined sugar, wastefulness, chlorine, being overstimulated, pork, fluoride, malls, vaping, thongs, disposable plastics, running, alcohol, Langford, really cold water, caffeine, hospitals, but also; being too far away from hospitals.

Hey, I want to invite Claire to this party in Langford where people go to get drunk and play sports in a chlorinated pool while vaping and chewing gum, but you know her better than I do so I wanted to check if you think it’s Claire friendly. It starts really late, but there are really bright overhead LED lights, loud top 40 music and sugary caffeinated energy drinks so I think that will help keep her energy up. I want it to be a surprise though so I’m gonna bring a thong and bra with the clothing tags still inside that I washed with tide laundry detergent that she can wear since she won’t have a bathing suit. What do you think? Claire friendly?