Convoy-cock. Military term describing the hard-on you often get when you're in the back of an army lorry (or bus) rumbling down roads on your way to some military activity.
Jones, wipe that silly smile off your face!
Can't sir
Why not?
Convoy-cock sir
Oh, fair one.
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When you're on a long road trip and your little man decides to stand to attention. Making your trousers a bit tighter.
Dude! I was driving down the motorway and saw one of them trucks where on the mud flaps it has a naked lady! I got Convoy Cock bad so I had to smash one out!
Made a right mess on the steering wheel!