Corporate Aikido

Corporate Aikido is the art of redirecting people who need help, instead of saying no, so you can get back to Minesweeper or, these days, Reddit. You use their energy against them, sending them off to accounting, answering their questions with a request for more information, etc. Corporate Aikido techniques and throws are best practiced in conference calls and meetings, where the unskilled opponent will appear to all to be combative and aggressive if he or she shows the slightest resistance to the Corporate Aikido movements.

How to use Corporate Aikido, by designbydave: "Yes, I am almost 100% sure what is wrong with your laptop, but I want you to go back and get more information for me, retrieve the appropriate power cables, software install discs etc so I don't have to work on it right this second, I'm currently reading a fascinating, 10 page article about a feral child that I found on reddit."