Couch crevice

A: The tiny section of the couch available on a regular basis because someone less deserving with much more free time on their hands has spread their unshowered gelatinous ass meat and back rolls and accompanying snacks, ashtray, Blaney, marijuana rolling tray, one dirty sock food stamp card, book they're not reading, pillow they took out of your room that now smells like their armpit, open highlighter, loose change, snot filled napkin, cell phone and rapid charger with cord that they swear they bought, and list of "Things To Do," all of which when shoved over toward the aromatic eyesore yields a sliver section on the furniture that you paid for available to you called a Couch Crevice. There is another version of Couch Crevice which ....
B: describes the friendly homeless meth-whores randomly deposited in the living room by roommates that have already enjoyed their company and were thoughtful enough to leave them behind to entertain others and steal things.

A; "Dude, suck in some of your funk and sweep off enough Doritos so I can squeeze my ass cheeks into a Couch Crevice and watch this educational program with you."

B: "Dude, who's the new Couch Crevice and when do I get to dip into Her? She's kinda hot for missing so many teeth."